All you lovely sinners

Can I bum a smoke?

2006-10-17T08:19:00.000-07:00

A good evening to you reader, I have taken to opening my entry (or any speech for that matter) like Charlotte Bronte. The beloved
writer of Jane Eyre. Since the sem break started, I resorted to being the bum again in our house. The useless,
lazy inhabitant who has nothing but eyes and ears for books, movies, and music. I am currently reading The Professor
by Charlotte Bronte, which I bought not too long ago in Fullybooked. It is an unusual love story and I'm liking every minute
of it. As you might have read in my previous post regarding modern romance novel, I've developed a newfound disgust
for their shallowness and repetitiveness.

This evening, my sister showed me, much to my suprise, my long-lost quest for black cigs which are becoming my thing now.
I had specifically expressed my desire to taste Djarum black, however, she turned up with a Black Bat cig--a japanese product
which further interested me.
I must inform you, reader, that I am no smoker. I do not smoke like a demon. My special regard for black cigs is mainly
rooted to its being sophisticated and beautiful in form and appearance unlike the commonplace white. If anything, I
look at young uns who smoke as uncool ones because mainly, I know, they smoke because they wanted to look cool and mature.
But they don't. As for me, I just wanted it, I want it black.
It was my fourth time (and it was like, two to three years ago) to smoke when I ventured to light one and finally taste this black beauty that has been evading me for
nearly a year. I was sharing it with my sister. As circumstance would have it I always end up sharing my cig with someone (okay, don't get disgusted, I don't just share it with someone, of course, I make it sure that I share it with someone who can be trusted to be clean). The first time I tried it, it was
the two of us who was puffing one single cig.
Actually the black bat cig tasted sweet. I joked with my sister if it was her saliva that I was tasting (much to my disgust of course,
I was trying to wipe off the filter before I put it in my mouth). But it was really sweet, unlike the menthol
cig which I prefer if someone would offer me a smoke.
So there, we smoked for a minute or two, contemplating, and looking at the night sky. My quest for the elegant
looking, my-ideal-black-cig ended, now I know where I can find one.

As she rubbed the butt of cig against the pavement, I asked my sister what makes it addictive to people
she said it relaxes them. I myself feel heady, but not addicted to it. Not yet. But if ever that time comes, rest assure
you will not find me smoking anything but a black cig.

Washed away

2006-10-01T08:34:00.000-07:00

You think I'm going to talk about the disastrous aftermath of Milenyo? Well, yeah, just a bit.

We all know that electricity had been cut off when Milenyo visited NCR, but what I didn't expect was that along with electricity, telecommunication also went down. So in the span of one and a half day, we saw a glimpse--just a glimpse--of what life was in the earliest civilization, in the span of one and a half day, we became nearly prehistoric human beings, relying on fire (well, candles, really) and the light of the moon. At that time, I had some discoveries: One, is that if my mother were to be isolated in an island, you should give her a battery operated radio with an AM station or she'll go mad and die. And two, I'm pratically useless with only a candle, or rather, I am practically idle and immobile with only a candle at hand, I can't read clearly, I can't write clearly, I can't draw with a meager light, I can't listen to my music, I can't think straight because I was thinking intermittently, in between spaces of time, how horribly boring life was during the medieval age. But whatever.

On the dark side of this however, is the blatant fact that children were rejoicing during the storm-filled nights because classes were suspended, but we must think of the people who live in paltry houses where tin roofs are easily ripped off from their houses, walls crumble against the mighty whip of the wind, and water rising instantly to claim lives. While we rejoice at the prospect of no classes, people were already mourning and searching for their loved ones, agonizing over their lost homes, rushing over to the hospital because of their injuries, and the lost of livelihood especially in the provinces. Before you think of wishing for another signal 3 storm to come your way, think of the people who are going to suffer over it and thank God and your lucky stars how fortunate you are to be living under a sturdy roof. It really struck me as ironic.
I never thought that Milenyo could bring such destruction on the way, trees uprooted, billboards tumbling down on innocent people, and power lines jumbled; bringing inconvenience to people.

So far, people are trying to mend the mess Milenyo wreaked over.

~~~~

I am supposed to embed a video here I captured this saturday. It's a concert of the Phil. Suzuki Association. No, they are not affiliated whatsoever with motorcycles or any appliances for that matter. It would please classical music lovers like me, especially those who like Violins, that this Phil. Suzuki Association is a group of young musicians, violinists particularly.

Just passing by The Block, they instantly caught my interest, luckily, I was toting then the digi cam so I had the opportunity of filming them, however, much to my consternation, the digicam only recorded about 20 seconds of their performance. And having spent most of my day in Fullybooked, I couldn't stay long in their mini concert, much as I want to. = (

I have three videos of their performance, each only in 20 seconds (sorry). I was thinking of embedding it here, but I don't know how, or is too lazy to figure out. I thought I'll just upload it in my woomp account, however, the files are too large, 30+ MB each; my connection is dial-up so that makes everything from downloading to uploading sluggish. But I'll try to upload it tomorrow, using my cousin's broadband connection. Promise.

~~~

This is a bit embarassing to write, but, yesterday, I finally got to watch the movie The DaVinci Code. It's a shame really that I only watched it yesterday being a fan of this book (no matter what they say about plagiarism or a supposedly bullshit content). The movie turned out to be so-so: if you hadn't read the book it would appear confusing, if you had read the book, the movie is lacking. The only actor that really suited his/her character was Paul Bettany. In my own opinion, I think he portrayed Silas pretty well. When I look at Tom Hanks, I still wonder why on earth they chose him as Robert Langdon; I believe Tom Hanks is an exceptional actor, however, whenever he talks, he looks as if he doesn't mean the words he's saying, as if, he couldn't believe he is saying those lines or that his mouth suddenly had a life of its own. He appeared doubtful, vacillating on the lines he was mouthing. Audrey tatou looked like a minor character, and Jean Reno, he has scenes where he acts like he isn't truly devoted to the role he is playing.
Somehow, I have to give credit to its goosebump-inducing scenes like the last one, where Langdon kneels on the spot where Mary Magdalene truly lies. Overall, the movie wasn't that bad, but it wasn't that excellent either.

~~~~
and before I forget, I'm going to post an independent entry about the play "Alamat".
And too bad, we will never get to watch the play Don Q (Don Quixote) at PETA, I really wanted to watch that play. pfft.

wish you were here.

2006-09-25T07:08:00.000-07:00

Sunday was supposed to be the day I'm taking a short break. A sort-of vacation after a weeklong of tedious school work. However, what could have been my vacation, turned out to be my exam day in LTS. So while my mom and my oh-so-lovely cousins enjoyed themselves in tagaytay, I was left here at home, bleeding over my english paper.

the-lost-children-of-sagada look. Look! they don't have two of their members. Me and Glen.

the kiddos thoroughly enjoyed the trip. I could almost hear them telling me "Wish you were here..."

argh... -______- ;

Probably the reason why there is misanthropy

2006-09-25T05:45:00.000-07:00

If there is one thing that truly annoys when boarding an fx in the morning (or in the afternoon it doesn't matter anyway) is that sitting right next to a heavy-set person, particularly men, who invariably seems incontented with the space alloted him he goes on encroaching your space. Now don' get me wrong, I'm not holding any grudge against the opposite sex, it just so happens that it is men who usually spread their limbs open, occupying as much space as he can, grinding you against the door or the person beside you. I understand you have something in there that must not be squashed, but what really compounds this already annoying situation is their amazing ability to appear indifferent; what's worse, they sometimes doze off ON you, forcing you to hunch over your limited space, God knows if the person is just trying to take advantage of you.

Apparently, I had the same scenario this morning on my way to UST. Already in a slightly bad mood due to my lack of sleep and continuous worry over my cursed paper, I was already apprehensive of the "heavy-set" person who sat beside me. It would have been a nice, quiet trip while I mull over my ill fated life IF he had not slept on the trip. His weight was being transfered to me as he dozed off, pushing me against the door of the fx, his thighs wide open and his head bobbing up and down like a buoy in the sea. I was irritated of course, what did you expect? I know I'm not an OC or maybe I haven't realized it yet but having your shoulder and arm pressed hard against this man's shoulder and arm disgusts me to the grossiest level, I don't want any close contact with any stranger, much less heavy-set strangers with suspicious looking faces and a habit of sleeping inside fxes during trips.

Several minutes later, I heard him snore. He actually snored. That's how comfortable he is in his place while I'm hunching over in my small space. He ought to be ashamed of himself. Snoring inside fxes are not allowed. Have some compunction, please.

Maybe it was Norah Jones voice singing over the radio that kept me from voicing out my irritation, or maybe it was the rainy day. I don't know. But I was eagerly scrambling out of the fx before I have the temerity to flash the guy with a glare. Damn him.

Another one that truly evoked anger in me was the news of the boy who climbed up a power post and was shot dead by a "tanod".
the tanod, who was drunk, admitted that he fired at the boy, telling the media that he was extremely annoyed by the boy's stubborn attitude (of climbing power posts that is). TV patrol showed the actual video of a young boy hanging by the post, having been shot three times, before evetually falling to his death.
Even if the boy truly annoyed the people for his being a stubborn mule, it is not enough reason for a man with a gun to shoot a boy merely because he was a "pasaway", if the boy was bothering you it doesn't give you any right to shoot at the kid. Damn it, do you even realize it?
The parents, who looked negligent, explained that the boy has epilepsy (i think) and is therefore the reason why the boy is stubborn. Apparently, the family of the young boy is a poor one (the typical one, with lotsa children running around) and I was thinking that their situation may have pushed the boy to climbed up the power post, perhaps the boy loved the freedom it provided, of scaling posts and feeling exhilirated, to win attention, and to feel separated from the world of poverty by being atop something.
there is one quote that I saw in some channel I was flipping by in the cable, it said:

In this mad world, only the mad are sane.

I don't think having epilepsy qualifies someone as being mad, however, in this cruel world, if you try to be different, if you try to severe yourself from the mainstream of society, you are labeled as a mad person. If you stand up from the crowd and do things out of the standard mode of social convention, you are condemned to being a mad, stubborn, stupid person. And in that breif moment of time that you gain something akin to freedom, that you do something that people wouldn't usually do, that is, climb power posts, someone will shoot you down. As fast as you felt an unknown bliss, death came swooping by, claiming your life.

Another thing that truly angered me about this accident is that, no one had the sense to improvise something that will save the boy's life as he fell to the ground. People watched him with amused looks, and as he fell to the ground, people stood there, watching a spectacle they did not intervene with. The boy fell. They watched. The boy died. I wonder if they enlisted the help of the fire station or other rescue mission to aid them. Maybe they just stood at the feet of the post, their head tilted, and their hands outstretched, thinking for one foolish moment that they will catch the boy with those bare, idle hands.

A Triumphant night for UST

2006-09-21T17:14:00.000-07:00

so, my first ever basketball watch is a lucky one, says K-ann, as we trudge along the front of UST library. Thomasians from every corner of the Philippines know that UST won against UE with scores of 82 and 81. A close fight that kept us on the edge, biting our nails. You can see that the both the UST and the UE basketball players were being pushed to their limit at the fourth quarter of the game, but I hope it's not the best yet of UST, the best is saved for last--Ateneo. When UST prevented what could have been the score--and victory, mind you, of UE at the last 30 seconds, everyone jumped out and triumphantly shouted and howled and shrieked. We won! The sudden barage of noise had me rendered temporarily deaf. But never mind, everybody was really rejoicing, UST will now proceed to face ATeneo (K-ann!) for the final competition. I doubt it if I would watch it because I don't think I can, I might hyperventilate or drop dead.

K-ann, thank your lucky stars. UST, praise your stamina.

Go USte! ;D

Accreditation. It is so warped.

2006-09-20T05:32:00.000-07:00

Accreditation officially started today.

The instant the Accreditor entered our classroom, everyone changed. It's as if a switch had been turned on, or a button clicked, and everyone, ESPECIALLY professors turned different.

It's pretty comic really, with Sir Filipino becoming all loud and enthusiastic; and Sir NS becoming all stiff.

It's funny to behold if only I wasn't sitting at the back and being interviewed by the accreditor herself. I didn't know whether I should converse with her in english or filipino. I was flustered and kept on stammering, flashing her a sheepish, guilty smile. As soon as FIL ended, I tried to scoot away from her as possible.

Well, luckily, I am sitted at the front in NS, however, Sir NS kept me busy turning on and off the lights.

pfft.

A Mess

2006-09-18T08:01:00.000-07:00

Paki-critique na rin. Salamat.

His Muse

Pliant body
wrapped in silky
violet
bends and twists
writhes and crawls
on him
white arms tenderly
encircle
an aching neck
and kiss and lick
and drink and draw
the life blood
on his petrified lips
And in her small, pale hands
she crushes his skull
out of their caves
a caged panther looks out
ready to pounce
and tear the brown flesh
and eat her white flesh.
Blood flows
from all sides
on the damp walls
of an unknown room
a storm in hysteria
the orgiastic call of
Dionysus' animals
drawing out
his innards
and feasting on them
She stands in the unknown corner
a beautiful goddess
possessing him
like the
very demons
of hell.

wtf-candlelight-party

2006-09-18T06:51:00.000-07:00

Wacky celebrated his first birthday party yesterday, everyone was excited, everything was set. My sister made it sure that this birthday party is going to be a blast...at least...for kiddos. However, what could've been a perfect party turned disastrous when from a hot afternoon, the sky rained hard and Meralco had the insensitivity to cut off the electricity. Optimistic people as we were, me and my cousins patiently sat through the warm and dark hours of the late afternoon, trying to cheer up and grope around in the dark for our food.

my two leading actors, with whom I would spend the next five hours.

hiding in the dark recesses of the room, me at left.

trying to cheer up in that god forsaken hour, in the dark.

c'mon, ben, smile. stop making that face.

the bored people. Still no electricity. This is becoming one heck of a party.

there you go again, ben... don't worry you'll get your cake ;P

When everybody have dispersed and gone home out of the cursed inconvenience the Meralco wrought, the electricity went back at one a.m. Fuck, I thought. Too late the hero, they say.

No amount of fanning could cool down my bad mood that night. However, my mother pointed out that it was a good thing, we saved what could have been a gazillion worth of electricity bill. In retrospect, I could only laugh at how tragically funny it turned out.

Whatever. Happy first birthday Wack ;D

Hey you!

Honey, give me a SMOOOCH!

book galore...almost

2006-09-15T09:04:00.000-07:00

I dropped by the National bookstore this afternoon ( we all know we had no fil and nat sci--a happy treat if BPI had not closed on me...dash it...), intent on browsing a book for Shen's in her 18th birthday, after some musing and frowning (at prices of books I would LOVE to read), I decided to buy Oscar Wilde's "The Happy Prince and other tales" a book that is actually for children. Yes, children. But I see no harm in reading children's book, in fact, there is a children's book "Prince and Prince" which actually narrates a story about a Prince falling inlove with...no, not with a princess...but with a prince!

Anywho, like I said, it was a children's book, but heck, it's for everyone! It was rather cheap at 99 (mas mahal pa yung NAt GEo na Mag in Booksale) with pretty interesting stories for people who started with adult materials than fairy tales. What particularly caught my interest was the The Nightingale and the Rose. A story that is surprisingly ironic and sad it brought me to tears! Well yes, I may be darn sensitive and the dialogue histrionic but there is something in how Oscar Wilde played the language--it's different. The story itself is different. And I like it despite the tragic irony.

After buying the said book and feeling contented, I headed to Booksale to look for any interesting but cheap books. Alas, I found none but stacks of nauseating romance novels. I went for the Nat geo mags, however, they're still a bit expensive for a magazine (but that's Nat Geo), I decided to leave, there is nothing here for me, even the Nat Geo is already costly for me to persuade me or anything on buying one. And it was a good thing. I thought I would buy Shen a book, a Paulo Coehlo book, so I returned to National Bookstore only to see a particular book of Haruki Murakami sitting quietly at the feet of the shelf, pnly five or four copies, I couldn't remember. Now, by all gods, we booklovers know how expensive books are, especially by acknowledged authors like Murakami, but come on, Sir Logic told us to invest in books didn't he? And how could we resist?like a chocolate lover to a chocolate bar?

I was going to pay for another book but BPI closed early so I'm left with the payment for the book like a searing coal in my purse, urging me, tempting me, along with the beautiful Murakami book "Sputnik Sweetheart" calling to me with its pristine cover. Gad, I'm spending too much like there's no tomorrow,why can't I be like the japs?
but I really, really wanted the Murakami book.
So, already planning and calculating the next chance to earn money in my head I walked slowly to the cashier. Here it is. Click. It now belongs to me.
*sigh*
It was a good thing, I know. I was taking advantage of the Huge sale going on. THe sale is the best thing yet next to a second hand bookstore. It really is. I get to save with its 20 percent sale.

So here I am. Beaming. Looking at the two new books I bought for myself today. Boy, now that I'm painfully aware of my newfound financial shortage situation, I still feel damn happy.

and oh, I have the Paulo coehlo book for Shen. Happy 18th birthday Shen! ;D

eek

2006-09-13T18:57:00.000-07:00

I had a dream last week. I have to summon all my guts to type it here. Of all people who would enter my dreams it was Jun Hirano of the PDA. I was truly surprised that he would visit my dreams. In my dream, I was in a very extraordinary mall with slides for escalators, it was really huge and weird. I remember being with someone but I can't recall who SHE was, however, I can vividly remember I was wearing a bright yellow ballerina outfit (a tutu) and wearing a killer stiletto shoes. I saw Jun Hirano with the PDA scholars strolling about purposefully. I and my companion started to pursue him and whenever we see him and He sees us, there was this reluctant look, and then we would lose track of him and then see him again. Finally, irritated, we gave up and went out of the mall. Funnily, the outside of the mall became the garage of my aunt's house (huh?) but before we went out, we accidentally passed him by lounging with his friends. He looked at us, we refused to look at him. Minutes later after we went out and sitting on the hood of someone else's car, He came out, smiling shyly and introduced himself. I remember looking at him and thinking "he's so cute" and "for once I think japanese men are cute". We, the three of us, became fast friends. We talked to him about Philippines and all the topics therein and vaguely recalled that I have the English Chart to do.

And that was the end of it. I woke up, terribly upset, not because my dream ended abruptly but because I had not expected to have a dream with a Jun Hirano in it, and was honestly freaked out of it. Another is that I was reminded of the cursed english chart which was still unfinished that time.
But hey, Jun Hirano really looked cute in my dreams. hehe

A prof said to us that Freud would interpret dreams as he would interpret poems. I was thinking what was the message of that dream? Was there irony? allusion? or does it symbolize anything???

Whatever it is, it had been truly a funny and freaky dream.

Ack...a big loss...

2006-09-04T04:44:00.000-07:00

AAAAGGGHHH! OHMYGAAAAD! He's dead! Steve Irwin's dead! I can't believe this...but it's the sad truth...

My sister and I first knew Steve Irwin the famed Croc Hunter when we religiously watch the Animal Planet (ngayon hindi na...National Geographic na ako), we instantly liked him for his funny accent and love for animals. I got wind of his death at TV patrol and was completely shocked I checked the net for news. And it was confirmed that he died of a sting by a stingray.

His death is a great loss to Animal Planet and the "Zoology World" as well (I don't know how to put it...I'm at loss of words because of his sudden death).

Poor Terri and their two children. Tsk Tsk...it really is tragic.

='(

it's fucking fun

2006-08-30T01:20:00.000-07:00

K-ann and I went to a particular internet cafe that recently opened to do our make up quiz for Poetry. We actually gawked at the tiny, flat screened monitors on the desks. I could actually smell the familiar smell of a newly bought/assembled computer. What the fuck, I long wanted this kind of monitor for YunYun. Aside from looking technologically swanky, it looks light (being small and thin), and downright cute.

But before we even gawked at these wonderful monitors, we went to the serial section and I took the liberty of browsing magazines there. I originally wanted to look for the National Geographic mag but what I discovered was a monthly (bimonthly???) issue of a Poetry book: PEOTRY: the humor issue. Here's a sample:

In a Bad Mood

Joan Hutton Landis

The trout are jumping in the fucking pond,

Mike's pigs are fuck in their nasty sty.

I know you want to fuck the little blonde

Who bought around the fucking cherry pie!

Yesterday I passed the fucking site

Where three young workmen cursed their fucking luck

One said he'd like to fuck old Fuck-face White;

They all agreed--"Let's fuck the fucking Fuck!"

well, if you want other truly funny poems, you can check the book at the Serials Section, under the Science category, Pharmacology.

Yes, it was fucking misplaced.

Isulong ang wikang filipino

2006-08-28T19:14:00.000-07:00

I know I should be writing this in filipino, but my lack of vocabulary and confidence stymies me this far to deliver a sound entry about the Filipino language. But the english language is the tool that I have and I know it would be alright to make the english language a vehicle for whatever judgement I want to make about my nation. I'm already at the road to perfecting english, I can't step back, but at least, let me tell you, that I would really love to learn Filipino, and is already in the early process of doing so.

Despite my abhorrence in reading twelve articles overnight, I still found the articles about the "Wikang Filipino" enlightening and fun. Along with those feelings, I also felt suddenly guilty and ashamed of myself for not valuing the filipino language. I did not, and never, thought that the filipino language is dull or "baduy" as shallow people put it; rather, I was completely taken by the english language and thought of the benefits one would have if he/she mastered it. So I did.

But now, reading Almario, Randy David, and Conrado de Quiros among others state their opinion blended in fascinating facts is eye-opening. It is a read every filipino citizen must read in order to be informed with what truly happened from our early languages through the spanish and american regime and up to the present with so many external factors exerting their influences upon our culture, beliefs, and language (mtvzation, showbizlingualization???).

Whenever I walk the length of going to my building (situated near dapitan) from the espanya gate, I am allowed a few minutes of contemplating whatever I need to contemplate. Earlier, I was thinking just how wondeful the filipino language is, especially with its borrowed spanish words. But even without the spanish and american derivation of words, the language still sounded deep and mystical, rolling in my tongue artfully, delicately, sophisticatedly. Amusing really. Try reading aloud a filipino poem. Go on, try it.

It would take time before I can write a truly accurate, pure filipino piece. But I would like to, sa totoo lang. Talaga! As in!

Haha! But you know, being a polyglot is so much better. But I am sincere when I said i wanted to learn the pure language of filipino, but I'm not giving up on english either or other languages for that matter. I don't think I'm being a traitor or whatnot. But you gotta hate mediocrity.

Sue me then. But let me tell you, the filipino language rocks so you better take a second look before condemning it "baduy" or dull.

*Isn't if funny that higher countries are trying their hardest to achieve english proficiency, while US, a developing nation who could boast HAD been proficient in english is gradually declining its usage? it could be that students are becoming more and more "ignorant" of this language, but that could be the Filipino language working its way through the youth and the rest of the philippine population. It's a two faced situation: both good, both bad (I still think that we need English but then...things change...and before you know it...it's Chinese language we'll need). While well-developed countries are forwarding to their er...bright future through the english language, We, on the other hand, are going backwards, tracing back in time to search for that long missing, long shunned identity. THEY have broken the surfaces, WE are diving back to the black waters.

poor identity.

Write Blind

2006-08-26T10:04:00.000-07:00

Seeking the true
golden light
He pulled out his eyes
and let the blood
gush down
on painfully white
paper
and they saw
with their equally blind eyes
the glaring beauty
He wrote.

I know I suck in poetry. Yes, I do. If getting low grades in quizzes is just stalling, then what it is? writing diarrhea? (as J.G. Villa once said towards a student)
This is a poem I wrote while mr. Wigley was giving his insightful comments and lectures regarding poetry. The title is Write Blind. God knows why I chose to write something about Writing Blind. But whatever it is, malapit na ang Ustetika...that's what matters.

Good luck sa ating lahat na sasali! Hanga ako sa mga sasali sa filipino category!

Romance going dooooown the drainage...!

2006-08-26T01:51:00.000-07:00

I have been or had been an avid fan of Judith McNaught. Famous writer of historical romances. Hey, we all know that 99.9 percent of women read romances historical or contemporary, just don't go barfing over the computer because you feel like to whenever "Romance" comes in your way, because if you want to just put it off for awhile.

I wanted to express my thoughts about Romance novel. THe very first I read was "Knight in shining armor" by Jude Deveraux--and I was devastated that a bookstore should sell a "Porn book", that's what I labeled it then, being the innocent/hypocrite prude that I am. Whatever it is, I had to admit that I liked it and so was her The Heiress.

Here comes McNaught sauntering by and I grabbed her novel "Until You" and was fine with it, but when I read her Almost Heaven and Something Wonderful I was delighted! it was the true romance drama every teenager bordering on adulthood should read...simply fantastic.

But as time goes by...I realized just how stale it is. Romance novels have the same hackneyed elements (here comes the highlander man...incredibly rich...detached...devilish...buff...dropdead handsome...darkhaired...and darkhaired...and darkaired...and of course oozing with sex appeal...Here comes the damsel in distress...sexy...innocent...kind...stupid...) and yet we still buy that same old crap. It is so trite I can't bear to read a romance novel without me glaring at it and holding it at arm's length away from me.

When Pia lent me Whitney, My Love I was enthusiastic because McNaught may have written stereotyped heroes but her stories are nonetheless a consolation. But it turned out to be somewhat...nasty...I mean let's tone it down a little...it doesn't look promising even with a truly interesting plot. Her characters are just so...repetitive, they are just outfitted differently.

I mean it doesn't stop with her...it goes with every romance writers. I think it may have been their editors forcing them to write something as sickly used as it already is because the majority wants this and wants that. I guess Mr.--- was right when he said that the true writers are the poor ones because theirs (work) don't sell--not because it is tasteless or dull. Writers who are after monetary matters write what they are told to write and they flourish...financially.

The basis for this entry dripping with sarcasm is that when you read a Romance novel it is just too good to be true. It is a fairy tale that is glaringly distant and untrue. Maybe things from romance novels happen...with celebrities...but they don't always live happily ever after. I want to write a complete essay of this because my opinions are just overflowing. But I can't write them all here and present them to you post-haste. This entry must already have lots of grammatical errors. And frankly, there are things I wanted to write here that may offend you...initially.

But whatever it is, I just wanted to let out the thoughts that had been triggered with my reading one romance novel. I had long given up on trite romance novels and is in constant search of that unique romance novel that will not make you grimace, at least. Fortunately, there are a few good ones out there.

So I realized that there are certain romance writers who are going down the drainage (for people like me). They are just so damn perfect...it is disappointing.

Problem solved albeit...

2006-08-25T21:33:00.000-07:00

2 new posts below. I changed the template because I had some glitch over it. But here it is! new blog name and new url! hehe babaguhin ko pa yan kaso wala pa akong time. I lost some of the tags including the shounenai fanlisting button, but no sweat! I'll have them back in time...I hope...
anywho, this is still under going construction...as usual...

3G's for you!

2006-08-25T21:20:00.000-07:00

Go Gary Granada!

I never thought this mustachioed hobbit would possess an adorable wit and humor, and a mesmerizing guitar playing. He was vaguely introduced to us by Sir--- last year but I didn't pay any special attention or what...until he had his symposium.

I know this entry is way late already, but I'd like to express the lasting impression he left us weeks ago. I liked him when he sung "Babadup-badup" a simple song about a gay. But what really won my heart was when he joked that he is forever courting Noel Cabangon--a fellow famous musician. Yay! hehehehe!

But generally, he really is just a happy man who happens to play the guitar and nurtures some insights about our nation and it's condition (government! government!) His music can be donwloaded for free. Up until now the only song that I have downloaded yet was his "Address" however my tight schedule wouldn't allow me to download everything with so little time I have.

Anyhow, I just wanted to express my admiration for his light humor and guitar-playing. He really is something. >.< V

Some light musings

2006-08-25T20:55:00.000-07:00

I was in the jeepney on my way to UST when Prof.---(I don't name names here)'s word came floating in my mind like a jellyfish would when you're in the middle of the sea. If there is one thing that I disagree with him with his insights, that would be his belief that animals shouldn't be loved yada yada yada. But he did make a point about environmentalists and mother nature, that we are saving Mother nature just to save our asses from becoming extinct or what. If anything, misanthropy kicks in and you are made to think that yeah, we are horrible creatures feeding on mother nature and She wants us OUT as in OUT to oblivion. If natural disasters aren't effective enough in wiping the whole humanity, Mother nature always has Viruses to do the tough job: slow but sure. It's evidence enough that we haven't found out yet the cure to this lovely viruses. It's a race against mother nature and father time and we aren't sure who's going to win like we were when Pacquiao and whathisname faced each other. It is amusing, really, because I began to think of the all time loved virus: Colds. Up until now we have no cure to this seemingly innocuous viruses invading our cold days and nights. Medicines offered for them (like Neozep) aren't really there to eradicate these viruses, rather, they just mask the symptoms. If ever this snivelling world found a--eureka! cure to this virus--then would the time come when every population of this world come rushing to hospitals and clinics to be cured? that would be a spectacle! You will never see a hospital as cramped as sardines! And then the streets and malls would be empty! Everybody are gone from their houses! Every news would feature this spectacular event--but then no oen will because even the news anchors and the staffmen are gone to have their vaccinations or what. No one would be going to parks and you would notice that SM is as spacious as the whole continent of AFrica.
THere would no longer be Neozeps. Hankies are now used for decorative purposes. Tissues are exclusively for toilet uses. And you will never have to say the words "Bless you" or "Gesundheit" to anyone anymore. It is now an archaic word.

BUt then, if these things were to happen, I'd sorely miss the red nose I have whenever I'm assailed by these viruses because honestly I think I look cute when I have a red nose and watery eyes.

^.^ v

missing???

2006-08-16T18:16:00.000-07:00

Miguel told me he couldn't access my blog through the UST computers (browsers), I can't figure out why. It could be the comp of UST itself or the Microsoft Internet Browser who's got a problem. If the browser can't read a tag I edited, why now? I did not tweaked any of its tags lately. Maybe I was banned or something?!

Well, I'll just try to solve the mystery later. Darn....

Suicidal na aso

2006-08-08T03:44:00.000-07:00

Aba! alam niyo ba na habang ginagawa ko yung entry sa ibaba nito yung "A comically suicidal story" e tumakbo yung katulong namin habang nasa kalagitnaan ako ng madamdamin kong rebyu para sa nobela at sabi, "Si Ty (yung aso namin na saksakan ng ka-gwapuhan kahit mongrel kasi mukha siyang pandak na golden retriever) hinuhuli sa labas (may nanghuhuli sa amin ng mga lakwatserong aso)." Aba, kahit nasa kalagitnaan ako ng isang madamdaming rebyu para sa nobela ni Uno Chiyo, lumabas ako at kumaripas ng takbo, mahirap na pag nahuli yon, tutubusin pa yun, isip ko. Aba e, tinakbo ko yung mahabang street namin hanggang sa kanto at humi-hingal ko pang pinag masdan yung mukhang pedicab na kinalalagyan ng mga asong hinuli. Handa na sana ako makipag diskusyon o di kaya ay mag drama dun sa drayber ibalik lang yung aso namin kaso malayo na siya at pagod na rin ako kakatakbo. Tumakbo ako pabalik para sabihin sa nanay ko na eksperto na sa mga "search-out" ng magaling naming malanding aso. Nang pagbalik ko nakita ko si Ty patakbo sa bahay namin, natakot yata. Natatawa na lang yung kapitbahay namin sa akin at ikinuwento na Kino-korner ng naghuhuli yung aso namin kaso nakatakas at nagtago. Walang hiya! anak ng tokwa! pinagod lang ako, nawala pa yung "train of thoughts" ko para sa madamdaming rebyu ko sa nobela ni Uno Chiyo. Takbo ulit ako sa loob ng bahay namin at sabay upo sa kompyuter at nag type, hanggang matapos ko ang "A Comically Suicidal story" na entry ko. Narinig ko na lang yung katulong namin na patawang sinabi sa Nanay ko "Beterano na daw aso mo ha! sabi nung naghuhuli."

Wala lang... share ko lang... hehe = P

A comically suicidal story.

2006-08-08T02:28:00.000-07:00

I am or was reading a book entitled "Confessions of Love" by Uno Chiyo in the middle of my prelims. And I took the trouble of spending more than half of my time in finishing it. This is a japanese love story. If you think the story is about Boy meets Girl, Boy loses girl, Boy gets girl, and they live happily ever after and all that crap, well you're in for a VERY strange ride. This is the novel young innocent girls shouldn't read. And that's not because of any sexual scenes, I might add.

The backdrop is in Japan in 30's and it actually, and I say ACTUALLY, revolves around a famous artist/painter named Yuasa Joji. This story explores the rare side of the philandering husband and his amorous affairs. When I generalize the story excluding the ending, it's a story of a man who is constantly assailed by despair and isolation. It's actually deep but it turns out to be more than deep, it is abyssmal in its story. He relates to us his life having a cold wife and child, to having a second wife and all the while maintaining (or rather messing) his passionate love for the unattainable Saijo Tsuyuko. When one reads this story without any training from Ma'am Macapagal, one would think that this is one hell of a worthless book with a protaganist chasing around, feeling various emotions, and having a very confusing love affair. If one does not follow the depressing moodswings and thoughts of Joji, you wouldn't be able to figure this story out and wouldn't bother throwing the book aside; but even if you try to meticulously follow it, you wouldn't get it at all. Actually, when i was reading the story it was like reading a japanese version of Dead Stars by Paz Marquez Benitez, and at the same time recalling to mind the star crossed lovers Romeo and Juliet.

As I neared the ending that was really turning out good in a dark, beautiful, chilling way, the story ended abruplty and outrageously! I reacted as how Mr. Wigley had when he read (as he told us) that one particular short story which ended so abruptly. I was so distraught I immediately searched out for a review or analysis of the said book but ended up reading reviews that has negative sentiments about it (and so I ended up here...). I know it is not a worthless read nor a "boring one" as one reader had stated. But what truly befuddles me is to think whether I was reading a sincerely good story and that I had missed the crux of it or that it is simply a story laid out from the experience of the author herself--Uno Chiyo who has numerous love affairs and abandons them one after another eventually when she's bored or what. Whatever it is, I have to know it because the book has made me restless and until I find that satisfying message that author is trying to convey the weird story will continue to haunt me.

On a good note, Uno Chiyo's story somewhat provided me an insightful glimpse into one of the somewhat dark recesses of the human nature. If her story both fascinated and disappointed me, (anticlimactically) it has more than inspired me to write in the same fashion (but not imitating her, excuse me). It's as if this "comically suicidal story" held a certain beauty to me that pushes me to write my own stories also tackling about the bitter and slightly dark side of human nature. I will not tell you how the ending went about, but it will hold your attention and then drive you nuts with the last paragraph, thinking you must have missed the nuances that are SO Japanese.

Oh well...that's literature for you.

Reopened

2006-08-06T07:21:00.000-07:00

Reopened my shounen-ai blog. You can just drop by here. Will change the above link in due time. Anywho, just downloaded "This guy's inlove with you pare" by Parokya ni Edgar, medyo late na ako...kailan pa itong kantang ito ngayon ko lang dinownload, hehe...whatever *grin* =D

Comme Toujours!

2006-08-05T01:50:00.000-07:00

Yay! after a long and hard search in Limewire, I was able to download the french song "Comme Toujours" by Les Negresses Vertes. Comme Toujours when roughly translated means As Always! This is the song that makes me want to skip about the quaint streets of Paris with a handsome hurdy-gurdy man under the french moon! hehehehe!

Again

2006-08-05T01:08:00.000-07:00

Friday late afternoon: I began to feel the stirrings of an upcoming fever by manifestation of a headache and a painful tonsil. By Poetry time I wasn't feeling well already, I couldn't focus on anything and I felt my temperature rising. At seven o' clock as I boarded a jeep, I knew I was certainly having a fever and began doubting if I'll ever make it alive to our house (thinking I might faint or collapse somewhere else on my way home). I decided to take a brief sleep in the jeep, I was so deep asleep I hit the side of my head with a loud thunk against a metal railing of the jeep. It was so hard I snapped awake and couldn't continue my sleep for the next five minutes, people must have been laughing at me. By this time, I was feeling horrible enough to believe I was not going to survive this trip. In addition to my head and tonsil, my eyes, my upper nasal passages, my back, and my feet hurt; so that when I headed to my second conveyance, it hurt even to walk. It didn't help either that the two students beside me were chatting loudly with each other while every passenger in the second jeep sat quietly, painfully aware of the conversation between the two college student. What truly annoyed me with the two is that they seem not to care that we could hear their conversation, it's as if they ARE making their voices loud and clear for everybody to hear just how lovely their conversation is, with a matching innocent look. Their voices were so childish they sounded dumb. They probably wanted the passengers to know either they are med/nursing students, or they are having a wonderful shitty life, or that she should have told her prof that the pulse was radius. Perhaps to an ordinary girl, their conversation is typical and shallow, but in a state where your nerves, temperature, and patience is heightened their conversation would sound more than shallow...it was completely dumb.

Observations II

2006-07-31T03:38:00.000-07:00

I.
This afternoon, I usually expect a scarcity of fx and jeep that are bound to SM WEST/ proj 6; but to my surprise, there was a resurgence of fx and jeep around unlike last Saturday where I managed to hail a cramped fx after nearly an hour of standing there and looking like an idiot. The ratio of SM west fx to, say, Cubao is 1:8.

II.
I saw Sir Western History at the espanya road hailing for an fx too. Surprisingly, he is with two girls, not with another man. I began to reminisce: I have every conviction that he is gay--or a closet gay at that, how could he have said that Men sleep with other Men in ancient greece with a straight face? it's a mystery that truly evades me. He said it in a manner as if it was most natural thing on earth (and maybe it is, soon). I recall he didn't even blushed or appeared flustered or guilty...

III.
My mom truly branded me as "Stupid" or "odd" when I told her I dropped by SM west just to buy a ten pesos worth of ice cream, spent precious fifteen minutes for a worthless; tiring walk from SM to McDo for my jeepney home. Another mystery that is amusing to me. How could I be such a daft?

IV.
Try to read the Bomb threat bulletin in the Main building, somewhere at the left when you enter from the front. It is truly amusing and educational. Wires and rods are described as "Sotanghon noodle" and "Spaghetti noodles". A colorful description that would have you fully equipped (mentally) when you roam around a cramped place. A read not to be missed when you are bored and waiting for someone at the main building. The description made me smile, even for just a second.

V.
And lastly, why do I always get to sit with men who have malodorous lives? I am always flanked at both sides with men who smells like...I don't even want to identify the infernal smell lest I have another headache. I began to plead to God why not sit beside me a woman?

VI.
As soon as I finish the template of my gay-oriented blog, I'll be posting all my sentiments about homosexuals there. And I have a lot to talk about.

Jammed up

2006-07-25T05:08:00.000-07:00

I'd prefer rainy days than summer days here in our country, yes, because it's like free; natural air-conditioning and it buys you time with suspensions, but sometimes it is just too much. These rainy days are driving me nuts and it isn't helping any that Ibikun got jammed up so i have to take it over for a fix (and hope that my files doesn't get lost or anything, man! it took me months to collect what collection I have in my ntebook!)

I was so bored I came up with this. This is my first ever fully-colored illustration. First I took seriously. It's shounen-ai themed and whatever people say about it I love it to the depths of my heart. I hope I'll be able to make more of this, and even better.

I was thinking of a title/name for it but whenever I look at it, I become giddy and think of a controversial, exotic story between an oriental master and his servant/slave/companion/assistant. I thought of naming it "Oriental Love" but that sounded like a food so I just settled for a more simpler and obvious name: "Master and Servant" Hahahaha! I know I know! It sounds so disgustingly dramatic! *rolls eyes* actually whichever of them fits perfectly would be the name.

I downloaded Paris Hilton's "Stars are Blind" (yes, Paris is venturing into the Music Industry), it is a little out of place this rainy season but it surprised me beyond my expection. It is a reggae with a nice beat to it, but I didn't expect Paris singing something about True Love. But then again I always overdo my expections one way or another.

Back to craziness

2006-07-22T06:41:00.000-07:00

Before Aubrey called me, I charged Ibi-kun. A notebook charges at least 3-4 hours to full batt. The moment I plugged the adaptor the phone rang. It was my dear old friend Aubrey who I had known since Grade 2 at St. James. We both draw anime, we both appreciate literature (at least I think so), and both of us were in the CAT MP. It's so nice to talk to a friend who you have known long and as crazy as you are in many things, I talked to her with a high-pitched voice and I can't stop myself from gushing out like a damn waterfall. By the time we hung up, Ibi-kun had already stopped charging. I'm surprised naturally because I didn't think our conversation was that long. Maybe two hours. And all we were yapping about (like there's no tomorrow) were Anime, and more Anime. From Fruits BAsket to Bleach to Tsubasa and finally to Eosrpg. It's funny, we observed, how one returns to her old ways when he/she is getting older and mature. I gave up on Anime when I was in High school and appreciated only a few, but now that I'm in college it seems that I'm looking at Anime at a different perspective, but I only allow myself to indulge in the time-old addiction at a particular time and anime. I don't get myself fully involve in it again because it would cost me my grades and status in the university. Anyhow, it was little a joyful ride back in time to talk about Anime with an old friend. It was really fun. And to cap it all, I was informed that there is an upcoming Anime convention at the end of July. I hope I get to see it. How long has it been since I last dropped by an Anime convention?

Anyway, Iani was pestering me weeks ago to do the drafts for my character in their (Aub and Iani's) RPG story. It's entitled Eos (I think), and I have a character there that I am responsible to. Iani is making the game itself, and he's also the one who is crafting my spells and whatnots. If you are interested, you can go here and check it out for yourself, although it's just the story and characters and we are just starting yet. THey labor over the game and story on Mondays (that's their work day) and I really want to join them so I can finally shape my character Morrigan Lyncoux to perfection. Aside from that, I really need to see Aub since we promised to each other that we are going to (or strive to) make our very own amateur manga. I'm really serious.

I thought of it again, of shifting or taking a course in Fine Arts. I don't want to let go of my passion for drawing even though I'm not really THAT good in the area. Still, I would like to hone my skills, but then I love the course I'm currently taking despite the fact that it's torturing me to death...whatever...

Gotta dash now. My coffee's getting cold and I have to finish some books...and some movies...

*Upcoming entry is about the classic movies I watched: Fiddler on the Roof, Camille, and What Is My Reaction Eventhough You Don't Want To Hear it.

Makes me less patriotic

2006-07-20T06:00:00.000-07:00

Today's History lesson pitched me to peaks of interest I never really felt except for a few. I know I love History along with Science (Bio and Astronomy) and the liberal arts to high heaven and it's causing me frustration, actually, because I want to take them all in college.

Anyway, back to History. Despite Sir Baron's legendary domineering and frightening demeanor (heard among students) I can't help but admire his knowledge and enthusiasm for sharing it--just as I was towards My Geo prof (although many would disagree). I think my heart was pulsating fast and my breath slightly quickening when he relates everything from Medieval Japan (which I'm growing to like, really, because originally I'm an Ancient Egyptian history buff) to the modern Japan and you can see that knowledge pours out from him like opened floodgates. Hearing him talk about WWII and inserting snippets of Phil History commands strong images in me I can hardly shun them away, seeing them move like a well directed film. But along with the heightening of my imagination and interest, his lecture made me reflect on the history of Philippines dejectedly. I don't know what I should be depressed about it, not until i truly learn the history and I'm sure Phil history had its share of glory. But I can't help comparing Japan with Philippines. I start to realize that I hold a love-hate relationship towards Japan. I am constantly mesmerized by their historical culture and pop culture (manga and j-pop) yet at the same time hate and envy them for their growing popularity (I know I sound unreasonable...). I am meaning to write an essay reagarding Asian states that are progressing to a brighter future while third-world asian countries lug behind, watching in all bitter awe the rise of these rich states. It's a pretty depressing thing to write so I haven't started yet.

Manila was beautiful back in those days, and perhaps we owe the Spaniards a bit for sharing to us this sense of medieval beauty (you can say Spaniards honed Manila quite well). I swear to God I would trade anything just to see the Old Manila of which I've heard from somewhere was considered as the "Venice of the East" for its beautiful canals. Yes, I do believe Philippines was rich and powerful back those days but as Sir Baron said, "Something went wrong", we are endowed with riches in many aspects but I guess we neglected it and is still doing so...

I know I am patriotic at heart, but there are times when you find yourself looking back and comparing things, finding it depressing a task. I know we should be proud of our History but until I meet that someone who will convince me of that, I have to say that no matter how lovely it will all seem to be, the philippine past lacks a little color, a little luster. Sue me if I'm being mean or ignorant or silly but that's what I feel. It seems like Japan has a more colorful history than Philippine has. What happened? I know Philippines WAS there to glow with all her unique beauty, outshining other states but what happened?

I am really intrigued. Curious. Pushed to the edge of my seat.
It really stirred me...

Enlighten me, please...

rehab please

2006-07-13T07:32:00.000-07:00

If you are homophobic (one who dislikes homosexual themes) and or the immaculate clueless, I advice you NOT to read this entry or you'll hate me for it. For all I know I am a born prude BUT this is just one of the entries that I let myself gush on and on about jap gay porn/yaoi. So to spare you any shock or distaste, I advice you to go away and ignore this entry until I post decent ones in two days or so. THank you for understanding ;P
~~~

This schoolday suspension bode ill for me, I know, for I am left the whole day with nothing to rave for but Yaoi! I knew it was really wrong but if you're a fangirl, can you help it?

This time, I finished:

1. Sex Pistol - it is all about Animal Magnetism. No explicit scenes, artwork fluctuates from gorgeous to unusual. A really good but absurd story, I tell you. This is the manga where men can get pregnant!

2. All Yamane Ayano's yaoi - well most of it. I love "Guide of Love", and "Like a Hero" (and there's this "Ikoku Romantan whatever" which is really good). Yamane draws pro with gorgeous men, she's so great with it you'll fall in love with about all her characters! This is where real bishounen lives! Artwork equals that of Yu Watase who I know draws fantastic men, but Yamane draws men even better! With Yamane AYano's world of yaoi there's no such thing as "women", meaning you will see no women meddling in the affairs, it only circulates with handsome men and more handsome men. *swoon*

3. Viewfinder/ My Love prize in viewfinder - help! my knees are buckling! Reading this yaoi will make you alternately gasp and melt. You gotta love Asami x Takaba in all their smutty goodness! and passionate scenes! I was thinking of joining a fanlisting of it, like here. It is another work of Yamane Ayano, and as usual the men are insanely gorgeous with rampaging sexual appetite. Lots of sex, violence, and sex (oops). If you want a protagonist who gets constantly laid (or rather, raped) this is the manga to read!

THis manga also made me unhappy because the scanlations Ate Madi gave me ended abruptly. I think it's licensed and ongoing but how the heck will I know what happens to Takaba?!?!?

Ohmigod! I am really getting dangerously addicted to Yaoi! please stop me! help! help! *voice gradually weakens* I beg of you...help...

And because of that: I now put Yamane Ayano as one of my favorite manga-ka alongside my idol Yukine Honami and possibly Yu Watase as well (well I'm not sure, really, but she draw bishounen really good too). Kudos to Yamane Ayano for drawing drop-dead gorgeous homos!

What a bum!

2006-07-11T19:12:00.000-07:00

Today is the opening of the much awaited (at least for us people...) movie Pirate's of the Caribbean Dead man's chest. And love as I may to watch I have no moola to shell out for a movie ticket. I guess I'll settle for a pirated DVD somewhere in August. How pathetic.

Much to my dismay too, I was not able to review the Jovian planets no matter how determined I am because the gracious and generous Ate Madi gave me a cd-full of Yaoi to rave about. I finished the whole chapters of The Fingertip Love hyperventilating and wondering how could a gay man who goes by the cute name of Nakagawa Toki sizzle like that?! Man, he's DARN sexy; and so far he's the only gay character yet that I found really virile and delicious without appearing to be homo, but then we love him for being a homo for chrissakes! Not even Kato Youji of Haru wo Daiteita could rival him (but I like Kato when he cut his hair)...I think... I just love the way he appears mysterious and romantic and obsessive in all his majestic darkness, but I love him more when he is all like that with his hair brushed down and sporting those cool glasses. I am so infatuated with him as he is infatuated with older men.

Stop gushing now. I fear if I continued like this my brain will turn to mush and I will have nothing else to think about but all Yaoi goodness (as I find myself frequently doing aaaaaaa!)

A glimpse back in time...

2006-07-09T01:45:00.000-07:00

With a regretful sigh I finished Laura Joh Rowland's The Concubine's Tattoo. While my classmate Joanna may have felt emotionally drained, I myself felt dazed and delightfully disturbed. Overall, I really, really like the book. Ms. Rowland depicted a setting that is lush, exotic and extremely intriguing. Supplying my senses with rich details, and if Ms. Rowland did a perfect research into the life and culture of 17th century japan, she might as well have given me a time traveling trip by the way she skillfully portrayed 17th c japan. I'm amazed at how she provided every single detail in the scene and how she interweaves all characters and stories into one fine web of mystery. At first read I knew this book has something to say, only the romance between Sano and Reiko didn't much pleased me, it might not have been as breath-taking as The DaVinci Code, but it is well worth the read. It gives an insightful look to Japan at medieval age, and because of this, it has spurred me even further to investigate and learn more about Early Japan as Austen had me with England. As for the characters themselves (setting is no doubt excellent, no questions), I didn' really like Sano Ichiro especially when he's with Reiko, I'm more interested with Hirata, Ryuko, and Yanagisawa. Rowland deftly put well chosen words in their mouth giving away their personality without having a minor characters state it, so you definitely hear them the way they SHOULD talk. They are individuals who are imperfect and has their flaws--that further impresses me, I hate characters that appear perfect and untainted. What I loved best with Rowland's book are the plot and the subplots related to it--it opens us to actions and deeds a human is capable of that both warms us and shocks us.

I'm truly grateful I've read this book because it has opened my eyes to a wholly new world of medieval japan. And for those who know me, I did not love the book solely for its homosexual content--I just liked it as a whole--as it is all linked together.

;)

It's a mad disease

2006-07-07T21:24:00.000-07:00

It rained hard this afternoon and I just came from a two day fever. I hope hindi na naman ako mabinat. I already lost two school days and it really peeved me, but the combined forces of trangkaso, rhinitis, and tonsilitis was killing me slowly (but surely), my mother acted at once and had me drink the hateful drugs at accurate times. I actually went to school this thursday but as soon as I alighted from the fx at the overpass, I felt so bad I headed right to the opposite street and hailed for a fx way home. Funnily, the fx I rode that time was the same fx that conveyed me to UST, the driver was giving me a curious look. I wanted to blurt out I am sick! and was not wasting good money for a senseless road trip.

Anywho, It's a good thing I wore my combat boots on my way here to the library to do some business. It's a bit flooded and my lower pants are wet so you can just imagine how freezing it is with a wet pants in a cold air-conditioned room.

Before I forget, I saw again the young man (or boy or lad) who was the basis for my PSP poem I posted here earlier. I recognized him immediately because his face was so memorable being that it reminds me the lead actor of Gohatto (sorry, I forgot his name...): rosebud lips and fair skin, his eyes were rounded au contraire but their eyelashes were thick, spiky and sooty (soot black) against his fair skin, if I were born a handsome man I would have fallen in love with him easily (ok...I was just kidding hehe). I don't want to ogle at him because he might think I'm some creepy girl having a crush on him, so I couldn't tell whether his gay or not. But one thing's for sure: he would have made a great japanese Kabuki actor.

The Concubine Tattoo is driving me insane. All these japanese actor and high-ranking officials prefering manly love is pushing me to the edge. It's like a disease that's haunting me forever and wouldn't be cured. It's influencing what is left of my art and story-writing skills, even my outlook in life and how I look at men (the above revelation is evidence enough). I must keep quiet or I will end up chattering endlessly about the wonderful japanese culture and manly love. Now I understand why numerous female writers write shounen-ai/yaoi in Japan (where it truly is abundant) it's because it is deeply rooted in their culture and history; their men look almost women; and they have no exact religion that prohibits them to tolerate gay theme--which in other countries such as ours is considered as a taboo.

That reminds me, I plan to go to Japan to nbe nearer the source of shounen-ai manga, and to look for a certain friend I sorely miss. She's a half japanese and super pretty (I tell you) and I miss her and her siblings. She's a year older than I am and I've heard she's working in a government as part-time. I wonder how her younger sister is now, Koyuki, to whom I am truly fond of? and Yusei, her younger brother who smacked my male cousin on the lips? When i think of it, it's so far a future, but I intend to go there and look for them and enjoy what Japan has to offer with them (and I hope they can still speak tagalog...how will I ever communicate with them...??? ^_^;)

This is just to say

2006-07-05T06:02:00.000-07:00

I disabled my bishounen-ai blog in the meantime because i'm fixing the template, it will return in weeks.

I'm sick...

2006-07-05T04:59:00.000-07:00

I'm sick. During my trip home I felt I was so pale I'd rival a corpse, my body was tingling with this unpleasant feeling like my skin is uber sensitive and my eyes (and head) hurt whenever I look outside that is a tad bright. Oh my god, I'm turning into a vampire.

I took a couple of hours sleep when I arrived home without even bothering to grab an early dinner and change my clothes, I slept right away. When i woke up I was burning with fever, but now it lowered to a mild fever. I don't want it to progress to a full-blown fever because I don't want to miss my classes tomorrow, 'sides I have my P.E. and I can't afford to have another two hours absent. Bahala na si Lord pag bigla na lang ako bumalagta sa gitna ng daan.

Alright, the main point of this entry is to inform you that I am changing the template again...both blogs. Miguel made a cute and awesome template for his blog. Maybe it's high time for me too to change it, if my blog content is not aesthetically pleasing, then I'll try to make the template aesthetically pleasing at least. That change is to take place on the weekend since our professors just looove to stress us. THe weekend is for rewinding oneself, doing a light review, running errands with lotsa time, and enjoying it through many different ways--like, for me, watching FMA marathon.
And also, I will post the new comic strip here sooner or later, maybe again on weekends since I'm also busy selling "My Kids" to my sister. You'll learn about that later on...

So that wraps it up. I have yet to do my NSTP assignments and exams, sell "My Kids", and allot about an hour of playing Warcraft II (or was it III?) god, I missed this one; I missed feeling all mighty and evil; even if while I'm playing god over these orcs and humans (I don't like playing the undead group but I do like hearing them talk by pestering them with the cursor, hehehe) I feel like there's an ongoing battle between orcs and undead inside my body and my runny mucus trailing down like Orcs on a wild onslaught towards south (huh?).

Aside from that, I have to type my two overdue entries: one about J.G. Villa and Nick Joaquin; and the other is about Superman.

But I'm in Lit

2006-06-30T09:34:00.000-07:00

Your Scholastic Strength Is Deep Thinking

You aren't afraid to delve head first into a difficult subject, with mastery as your goal.
You are talented at adapting, motivating others, managing resources, and analyzing risk.

You should major in:

Philosophy
Music
Theology
Art
History
Foreign language

What Should You Major In?

no Lit? but there's Art!

who was looking through the window...

2006-06-30T09:20:00.000-07:00

Whenever I see a man smile differently towards another man, it sends shivers of delight through me. I rarely see live action between males and so...this brief event is forever marked in the mind, searing and clear as a branded mark on a skin. Whenever I see something intimate between two good-looking males I feel so darn happy...*

;D

Pale skin
smooth under
his rough hands
Warm
and makes him mad
Shapely lips
a woman would kill for
He fears
to look at the downcast eyes
eyelashes sharp and black
sharp and black
His dainty fingers
wrapping around his
rough hands
He cursed
His heart trembled.

aaa, syet...para sa mga mahilig sa PSP.

*I will not name them, but for my lit mateys, you probably know who I am refering to with this accident. hihihi

Watching

2006-06-30T08:32:00.000-07:00

It's funny observing people you ride with in the jeepney or in fx(s). This afternoon, instead of going through my monotonous habit of shutting down inside the jeepney ( my travel time is an hour more or less...tell me what should I do within those dragging minutes), I had the simple pleasure of watching people's attitude toward each other. In this particular jeep, there was these two men who were talking, or at least one of them is actually doing all the talk with matching booming laugh and loud voice while the other looks on uninterestedly, as if the congested streets of espanya was more interesting than his companion--who is indifferent to his bored companion's straying attention and keeps on narrating stories that will put even an insomniac to sleep. It was like he was talking to himself and he didn't care if his companion was listening or not or was regarding him with a bored, annoyed look. He carried on cheerfully, thinking his stories were the funniest of all boring stories concieved, and thinking he is funny as hell as well.

There's this mother who kept on scolding her two sons in front of the passengers. Pinching him hard and yelling at him to go to sleep (imagine someone yelling at you to go to sleep...would you be able to sleep at all...?). I thought the woman was pretty cruel and shameless, if I had the guts I would have told the woman to keep her mouth shut because she was pretty noisy. Her tone and words were grating against my ear. The two kids were pretty stubborn and they ignore their mother. While I look on, I notice a elderly woman staring at the two boys with something akin to tenderness...perhaps she longs to have little kids for grandchildren even if they are incorrigible. Ah, the desires of a woman who is coming to an age...

The sight of a young mother and a young son together touches me deeply. There was this mother and her 10 (or somewhere near it) year old son who gently laid himself to his mother's lap while his mother brushed his hair back while the child snuggled and closed his eyes. It is so beautiful to behold. A woman's body was made to be soft and curvaceous for a child to lay on to for security and assurance. A boy sleeping on his mother's lap is a pretty strong image to me, being that it symbolizes filial and maternal love in its most subtle and quiet way.

There are a hundred of unusual things i encounter everyday during my trip to and fro, mostly in jeepneys. Some are funny, some are profound, and some are plain idiotic but still amusing... Watching them is actually helpful for me, especially when I do stories of varying themes and subjects, they themselves become my subjects or source of inspiration. How many times had it been when these observations inspired me to write. Countless times and still counting.

argh

2006-06-28T03:34:00.000-07:00

I just got humiliated in NAt Sci this afternoon because that person was being a complete b*st*rd. Anywho, I brushed it off now because thinking about it, he was not really worth my precious anger/hatred reserved only for those who are truly deserving of it--to some way. Besides, this humiliation is an oddly constructive force that spurs me even to delve deeper in the studies (of any genre), meaning that what I'm doing is not enough and I must push harder to put people like him to shame...or something like that...although I don't want to be nasty.

This morning, I have the odd feeling like I'm drained out of life. Like everything's a blur and I'm not bothering to clarify important things...I guess alot of things really pissed me off lately and I'm slacking over and encountering alot of assholes nowadays. Is this a stage? a common stage that each and every students are bound to go through as they progress along the way? Or is it just plain stress showing in my face...?

Tonight, I'll ask my mother if she would let me go up on the roof to see the nightsky, not because I need it for my astronomy course, but because I love the night sky. When I'm traveling by ship to distant places, I always go to the deck and observe the perfect dome of sky with the dark sea reflecting it and the landless horizon, in a way it is utterly thrilling, like you are living in a world made entirely of shallow water. As I said, I want to gaze at the nightsky but since it looks like it's going to rain, I'll just try again next time. Next time, hopefully, the night sky would be clear and wonderful. Even if I can't yet trace constellations, I would still like to stare at them for hours. After all the hustle and bustle of college life, the night sky serves as a wonderful catharsis to me, purging me of all the stress and mental/spiritual/emotional pollution you acquire when you are in a cruel world like me.

Freaky Fast-tracking

2006-06-18T06:59:00.001-07:00

I was doing my research for my natural science course regarding the Earth's past, present, future place in the universe when I stumbled into this. I don't know if this is true and I am partially calmed by the universal fact that this aren't confirmed or accurate...yet...or so I hoped. the list starts from 2010 (which is not so far away) to an astounding 10 superscript 100. One of the listed assumptions is that a an asteriod has a 1/300 possibility of hitting earth on March 16 2880. 2880? 2880!!!

Another one is that Vega might become our pole star, kicking off old Polaris in her old job of being the pole star, Milky Way (where we are) and Andromeda galaxy might collide (Imnagine it...I dare you...), and that the last blackhole will evaporate in 10 superscript 100 and there will be little or no life at all...

Really, this is too much for me...we all know that we are long gone by then...but still if these were to become true I don't know...it's a colossal question mark before you that is both utterly horrific and terribly fascinating...

On a lighter note, I downloaded "Why Can't I" by Liz Phair and "beautiful" by Patrick Nuo--a beautiful song to hear especially for those who are vain and are taken by someone else's beauty. In my case, I relate it with bishounens *hint hint* ^_~

The Lake House

2006-06-18T06:10:00.000-07:00

I watched this movie this Happy Father's Day for no apparent reason at all but boredom. I watched it with my mom (who'd prefer to watch All About Love) and my ever-sophisticated aunt (who'd prefer to watch western movies), with three other companions. We watched in Gateway.

First of all, I would rate the movie overall a three and a half stars. So-so. This is the movie that will not "kilig" you to death, rather, it is a movie that will have you thinking how impossible this plot is in real life. It is a warped vesion of "Somewhere in time" with a two year gap than a half century gap. It is a movie that does not zap you with electrifying tender moments. It is a movie that is subtle and very simple, and does not aim to electrocute the audience with passionate love scenes (until the end). No matter these issues, the movie turned out to be a really good love story that mature audience would really appreciate. A love story that is impossible but magical and has a few extra hints/clues thrown in, early on the movie I already figured out what will transpire at the end (so i wasn't really shocked like the couple beside me), that's observing hints to you, and THAT'S what you learn from being a student of Ms. Macapagal: sensitivity and sharpness.

About music, half of the tracks are not exactly my cup of tea, they are music that older, lovestruck audience AGAIN would appreciate. The way the scenes are conducted is well executed and somewhat new to the eye (or maybe I just haven't watched a movies for years until now), the performance of the actors are flawless; you don't see Kate Forster as Sandra Bullock or Alex Wyler as Keanu Reeves having their love story and they don't go sickeningly over-romantic with each other, it is balanced and much of the action itself is happening on missives exchanged. The plot? Well the plot is the jewel of the movie. THe plot for me is terrific--a really good story that would have been even better and romantic if only the director and the actors chose to, but how it was played out was good enough, good enough for a good review. Of course, I won't tell you the ending, that would be spoiling it, you've got to watch it and judge it for yourself. When you watch it especially if you have no instinctive idea at all would be a little difficult, but you'll figure out the story itself as it goes along. A little confusing but gratifying at the end. The movie made me shed a couple of tears but when I look at it, the movie itself isn't really that sad or tragic (that's a hint for you). It's a different kind of feel-good movie.

Gohatto

2006-06-17T00:08:00.000-07:00

I finished the japanese film "Gohatto" (taboo)Mitch lent me. It is a film about a pretty boy newly employed in the Shinsengumi who is having fellow men lusting after him. There are swordfights that are thrilling to watch and a couple of sex scenes that would have innocent girls gaping (no, it's not THAT explicit). In addition to that, the plot is quite confusing at first due to scenes that suddenly pops here and there. Overall the film is good, the plot is sinfully dark, setting is alluringly dangerous, and characters are good (how do I explain it?!) especially Okita Soji and Sozaburo Kano . Eventhough the mild-looking Okita Soji is rarely seen and Kano dominates the movie the two are outstanding in their portrayal (Kano has this really she-demonic aura). This is not your any other gay film, it is a dark gay film in my own judgement with vague hints thrown in for the viewer to digest and conclude. However it is, the last scene of the movie was a bit chilling and leaves the viewer wondering what happened to the rest of the movie. This movie really left me both confused and amazed.

Wittgenstein

2006-06-15T07:19:00.000-07:00

A year ago...I came across this quote:

"The Limits of my Language means the limits of my world"

This one is from Wittgenstein, it so happens that a year later, a prof would ask us to research on Wittgenstein, I was a little thrilled to know Wittgenstein's philosophy because this quote above truly caught me and ever since then have been my signature (favorite quote) in a certain forum I was participating. When i read it, I felt that in that one line, everything was expressed in what I believe and think of. For me, having limits is an inhibition and I'm the person who thinks her world is so much more wider, vast and profound in ways I can not merely tell you in a single entry without much organizing my thoughts. In those few words, it expressed a message that I value in my life and had been amazed at, for some reason. Up until now, I hold those words of Wittgenstein true to my heart because it means so much to me. I, who fears seclusion of some sort, who fears a certain dead end, who fears innate hindrances; and outside barriers, and above all hates all of these fears.

These words encourage me further, giving me a wholly different outlook, and is making me since then think alot...

LIT 207

2006-06-15T07:00:00.000-07:00

As another addition to the wholly interesting duo of courses (meaning History and Nat Sci), LIT 207 turned out to be "Poetry", yes, the study of Poetry and everything it covers from imagery to criticism. It is truly a great course to have and I'm hoping to say that the professor who is going to teach in this area looks promising (if I said he's great and excellent, I fear it might backfire or something, I do believe in Karma and such things you know), another consolation for the time I have to surrender to academic attention.

First day...nothing

2006-06-14T08:37:00.000-07:00

What did you expect? an entry about my first day of school? Well heck no...because truth is I'm too lazy to do one, and I didn't evaluate any professors, personally, as long as they teach worthy things worthy of attention and time, that's fine with me. However, i did note that first year Lits are quite a turnout, and that having an afternoon sched sucks, really, because on Tuesdays and Thursdays I will miss my beloved FMA, Detective Conan, G(?)SOK, IGBAA and the precious hours worth of drawing and daydreaming; that really depresses me. But I'm somewhat happy to say that there are subjects that would compensate, rather, console me for the whole academic year like Natural Science and History. I only wish that new professors tomorrow will do justice in the areas they are teaching and not become as crappy as that one previous prof I had.

National Artists

2006-06-09T23:30:00.000-07:00

Just in case you are as shutted-in as I am (meaning, no contact whatsoever with the outside world) you might want to know (especially for my Lit mateys) that Bienvenido Lumbera won the award for National Artist for Literature. As we can recall (again, Lit mateys) we had met both Mr. Lumbera and Mr. Cirilo Bautista--his former competitor--in separate occassions (I can't remember really if we had them both in the same event), Mr. Bautista's poem "Patalim" really impressed me with its message and the way he wrote it, but so does Mr. Lumbera with his essays. Personally, I am rooting for no one in particular because they are both great in different genres. Now that he is National Artist for Literature I value more his autograph in my book, sadly for me though, I never had the autograph of Mr. Cirilo Bautista.

If you want to know the rest of the awardees in different categories, just read it here.

As for Music: I downloaded the new song of Orange and Lemons "Lihim" and Mayonnaise's "Bakit P2". As for anime songs, well, I don't have any idea for now.

Bishounen and shounen-ai!

2006-06-09T08:28:00.000-07:00

My blog dedicated to Bishounen and Shounen-ai is officially open albeit it is undergoing development. For those who are into Anime, most especially to Bishounen and Shounen-ai, you can drop by. For homophobics, the clueless, and the disinterested, DO NOT GO HERE.

So there.

White Wine

2006-06-08T23:37:00.000-07:00

I thought yesterday was the day I first tasted Martini, well no. I learned later that Martini is white wine, and so is Champagne, it is subsumed under one liquor, no matter, I still think Champagne is a lot more bubbly and exquisitely tasteful than Martini (at first taste, Martini tasted like chilled 7-up /sprite with a dose of zonrox, but tasty nevertheless.

Also, yesterday is the day I ate dinner with a violin serenading you (not that I had a date). It is also the first time I ate a shawarma-like sushi, all sorts of cheese imaginable in a huge, ornate silver tray, chilled whipped cream with chocolate, cherry and kiwi on top served in a fancy sniffer glass, and stole packs of butter from the buffet table. Yesterday was the day I was certain I am going to stuff my mouth with cholesterol rich food, I can't wait for the classes to start because when it does you are so stressed you are going to lose about half of your weight you had unwittingly acquired throughout the summer lazing days.

Recalling the thrilling sounds of a violin, I always wanted to learn to play a violin at mag ala mad virtuoso violinist kung baga. Violinists struck me as meaningful people, meaning there is so much happening in their life than what is happening to a local celebrity. The music of a violin is either mournful or enlightening, if God did not intend me to be a violinist, then I would be that one person who will listen to a violin all her life and write stories inspired by them. If ever God would give me a chance to live another life with lifestyle choices I would either be an impoverished, traveling violinist or an impoverished, traveling artist. With that, life is so much more tragic and "meaningful".

Plans

2006-06-07T00:58:00.000-07:00

In the not-so-far future, I am planning (and I am serious) on splitting my blog into two categories. I am worrying that my current blog is currently flooded with my nonsensical entries regarding Anime and more specifically, Shounen-ai...so I'm going to split it. La lang...share ko lang =D

Oh-some!

2006-06-06T23:29:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Animax aired the first two episodes of God(?) Save our King! and to tell you the truth, it is so fantastic, expecially for me who has an eye for bishounen! It is an anime that is truly hilarious and pretty to look at (just stare at the pretty boys!). Artwork is good, neat and not yet crappy, music is fine, background illustration is good, and so far the story is good too, dubbing is fair (not as fine as FMA I guess) but the characters are fantastic! you just gotta love this pretty boys. Throughout the two series I was going mad and squealing and squirming in delight whenever these bishounen are in the spotlight! Yuri looks even more handsome when he becomes the true Demon King, Conrad is generically cute, Gunter is silly but gorgeous, Gwendal is appealing even when he is frowning andI can't keep off my mind that Wolfram looks more like a girl than a boy. It is a world beautified by the presence of lots and lots of potential, bishounen seme!

All throughout I was thinking What the heck? is this some Immaculate Conception? And the theme is very british--so early england! The joy I felt in watching this hilarious anime is ineffable, just let me tell you that I like it!
For Shounen-ai lovers like me, there is this scene in ep.2 that will have you grinning wide: Conrad and Gunter give Yuri a black bikini brief to wear as the formal underwear for the dinner party, suddenly Gunter blushes (I think) and looks flustered saying, "I'm so sorry, the naughtiest most irresponsible image just flash through my mind! I must go clear my head." and walks away. Hihi! XD

Like pepper and salt on a typical soup, This anime appears like your any other fantasy story but thanks to its quirky humor and light shounen-ai theme, it distinguishes the anime as oddly hilarious and cute. The opening and endin theme is not as hot as FMA's but the ending music video is cute with the their chibi version chasing around (see it below), I downloaded "Suteki na Shiawase" by The Stand Up--it's ending theme. THe story is well paced but I had read that the 2nd to the 5th volume drags around, I don't know about the episodes beyond that though.

Unfortunately, my class sched is a great disadvantage for my viewing sched, I'm going to miss FMA, Detective Conan, and God save our King; but you know Animax, THEY HAVE REPLAYS! I checked the sched I can watch the replays on Sat and Sun! yogata!

Here are the chibis chasing around in the ending theme video: Hihihihi! got it from here!

Gwendal, Yuri and Gunter (somehow I've got the feeling that it's GwendalxGunter if not GunterxYuri)

Conrad, Yuri and Wolfram.

Anime Wedding? anyone?

2006-06-06T08:28:00.000-07:00

If you wanna get hitched with a bishounen? (even just in the net, if not in real life) maybe you would like to get a wedding license here. I myself thought I'd wed myself to Aya of WeiB Kruz, but on second thought, I'd rather wed two bishie like *aherm* *aherm* Touya and Yukito and adopt the couple or have them adopt me as their child if it's possible. So if you know some site sporting this kind of fun make-believe, kindly tell me and I will lose no time in hurrying a nuptial between bishounen hunks.

Got it

2006-06-04T08:50:00.000-07:00

I have to redo my template again (but the theme wouldn't be for a long time =D) because of things I added and will add. I think I'm really getting the do's and don'ts of HTML and CSS with little guide from outside tutorials, sooner or later I will be able to tweak the codes big time and produce a good layout, however, I'm still groping around and being sure I do the codes right, but oh man! I really like to have my own designed template! Bloggger is surely the easiest way about for a beginner like me (although I have been around the block since senior high)

I wish someone could tell me though the right tags for disabling right-clicking, I'd appreciate it!

Alright!

2006-06-04T07:01:00.000-07:00

Since I first watched an anime and first held a Manga I always wanted to create my own anime/manga. I've failed many times to accomplish it. I had numerous plans that were never put to action, and there were countless times when I attempted to do a manga but never got to finish it either because I lost the inspiration or I lost the passion all too easily. However, today, I have a new story I want to make into reality--a shounen-ai themed story nonetheless (BWAHAHAHAHAHA!), a story I am truly obsessing with since I heard the lyrics of "Goodnight and Go" by the fantastic and my new fave Imogen Heap. I downloaded the music along with Laslo Bane's I'm no superman which further fueled the inspiration, and the amazing noise music of Animal Collective's "Leaf house" whew! as for anime soundtrack...I downloaded the opening of Witch Hunter robin and is looking for the opening theme of Alice Academy.

Anywho, I am truly serious with this story about a young talented, traveling musician who meets a fellow musician in a cafe! Ah! just thinking of their story makes me melt like ice cream under the sun! I am currently doing the characters drafts and the storyline! Please pray for me that this story be successfully put to paper! May I not loose the inspiration! NYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! So who's with me?

A funny (I hope...) portrayal

2006-06-01T06:56:00.000-07:00

I drew this because my nephew has this involuntary habit of closing and opening his fist and looking ALL PETRIFIED and TEARY! When I imagine it anime style, it is absolutely hilarious eventhough my illustration is not good enough to show that truly funny face he makes!

Ah, but it is wonderful to draw again! and to draw those people you are truly amused with!

Bang your head 1,2,3!

2006-06-01T05:40:00.000-07:00

My enrollment turned out bad. If you do not bruise your feet in the process of waiting hours and hours under the evil sun, you will end up with an unwanted P.E. slot. It really annoyed me that for the third time, I got a P.E. that I really did not intend to get especially the fact that there is a terror teacher in this course and that I have no friends around. Bad Luck. The last slot avilable was Table Tennis and it did not help that the lady behind the table was being unhelpful. On my way home, I was really pissed off, but thinking of it, it wouldn't be such a "hell on earth" as long as I don't get that Mad Rabid Teacher. I'm seriously going to ask all the angels and deities presiding over mankind's fate to spare me that. Better yet, I'll offer a pasyon! a dire prayer no supreme being will ignore!

brushing off this fury over P.E., I am downloading the wonderful second ending theme "Tobira no Mukou e" or "Yellow generation" of Fullmetal Alchemist. FMA is sooooo waaaay cooool *drools* and so does their music! I'm falling inlove with the trio: Ed, Alphonse and Mustang! Talking about "drooling" I saw again my long lost friends K-ann, Sharyn, Sarah and the rest of the gang! It was so fun reuniting with them again, I couldn't stop myself from talking wildly and smiling all the time (with occassional complaints and threats though). It's great seeing old acquiantances after the summer, only the P.E. was the letdown but I'm a little--just a little--excited to go back to school and to be with same old classmates again. However, it really depresses me that with the late schedule, I will not be able to watch FMA at 6 and the upcoming anime Kyo Kara Maou (banzai! banzai!) at 7, but I think Animax has compassion towards student viewers that they have the sense to offer replays! yogata ne!

Talk about anime, Jhed was asking me for a copy of Midori Days, as I said earlier, I uploaded/copied the 2 vol DVD to Ibi-kun because yunyun has no DVD software to read it, but has a dvd-rw. Ibi-kun can just read, not burn one. I'd better borrow the dvd copy from my cousin, hopefully he has new ones I can pirate! Ahhihihihihihi!!!! So if anyone there has a DVD software and is kind enough to lend it to me, please do so, my dear Yunyun needs it.

By the way, I'll post my review regarding Midori Days later--I finished it yesterday noon.

WoW!

2006-05-31T08:57:00.000-07:00

What Witch Hunter Robin Character Are You?

Hosted by theOtaku.com: Anime. Done right.

I watched an episode of this anime and I thought it's really cool. I like its dark and mysterious theme.

Cold day

2006-05-30T20:51:00.000-07:00

After long months of having not a single sneeze, i woke up this morning with a clogged nose and drowsy feeling, I caught yet again my long time friend "Cold". While I am trying to keep the mucus from trailing down my nose like Amazon river in this snivelling world, I thought maybe my deceased Grandfather is punishing me with this, my mother didn't escape his wrath too, she too is coming down with a slight fever. Maybe because yesterday, on his death anniversary we were supposed to be praying and silent and respecting the day, but from the looks of it, I think we were having a major party (and I am the one left cleaning after this Major Party mess) and hollering and laughing like maniacs (I overexaggerated that) so i guess my Grandfather who was probably hovering about got pissed off. And to show he appreaciated the celebration, he gave me a clogged/runny nose.

But on the contrary I was able to borrow and copy from my cousin his DVD of Midori no Hibi (Midori Days) since I could not transfer it to "Yun-Yun" my home based PC because he didn't have the dvd software alebit he has a dvd burner, I just transferred it to "Ibi-kun" because he can read dvd but can not burn one. Judging from this anime, I conclude that Japanese can really be horny as hell, but they can also make great comedies, great romances with a drop of tragic drama to complete your day (with a tear). Midori Days is funny as hell, although it is a little irreverent for me, being a prude I am (and I am not being a hypocrite...hihi).

Another boring entry...I think...

2006-05-28T09:17:00.000-07:00

THis is becoming a series of endless anime pursuit (reawakened passion) related entries because I'm going to tell you nothing happened in my ennui-ridden life, no meteors hit our house, no wild elephant barged in our home, and no mecha-robot kidnapped someone I knew, nope, nothing, nada. But I promise to do a couple of serious entries and hopefully would follow worthy ones deserving of attention.

Today, however, I downloaded accidentally a music from Ghost in the Shell stand.alone.complex by aphex twin that would be useful as a cool background music for any productions you are meaning to do, seriously. And talking about productions. Why not check this out. I checked it already but the tuition is way up from what I can afford. So no can do. You, however, dear reader may have the money enough to provide yourself with seemingly quality sessions.

As of today my mother asked me if I wanted to watch SOP live in GMA. I am no GMA fan, but I am no variety show fan either, so NO. It took her a lot of begging and wheedling but I stood staunchly and refused to go everywhere near a celebrity. However, upon ariving home, she gave a fan with anime pics on it. I didn't like it, I would have cared if it has Fullmetal alchemist or Gakuen Alice on it but the anime characters on the fan were strangers to me. Who the heck are they???

Anywho, like I said nothing magical or tragic happened, only that I got a fan I don't like, even if it has anime on it I am not familiar with.

Thought you might want to know...

2006-05-27T06:29:00.000-07:00

Since I am a sucker again for anime soundtracks, I thought that anime music downloaders like me would like to drop by here. My cousin introduced it to me and assured me it is free and easy to download (by time). Despite that, I still prefer Limewire, but I honestly find it useful...whatever. Just downloaded the ending theme of the humorous anime Yakitate!! Japan "To all tha Dreamers" (yes, the spelling error is what it is as it is spelled) --a blend of disco and rap music.

From what I am doing nowadays, it sounds awfully boring...but a little bit fun...O.O

that's so French

2006-05-26T02:55:00.000-07:00

Alas, I want to go here but may not. I would not want to miss the Photography by Juan Caguicla (and others,Akie should know this). Evidently I missed the Christian Lacroix couture in addition with Major French Contemporary Artists, that really bites. I wish I wish I wish I will have the opportunity to view even just the film festival and photography exhibits, Oh I wish I wish I wish.

Change

2006-05-25T08:40:00.000-07:00

and oh by the way! for those who have seen the Catatonic theme I recently replaced for Of Cabbages and Kings I'm changing it AGAIN. Another theme. I'm just getting tired of nonsensical themes I have and is still searching for that "right" theme that would compliment and suit and would accurately describe my life and insight in just a couple of words. Currently I'm experimenting with my html template again, and like I said, I changed the journal name. So no biggie ;D I'm might also take the tagboard off the page sooner or later.

Overdue

2006-05-25T08:11:00.000-07:00

Yogata! I have finished reading Dumas' The Count of Monte Cristo after all the procrastinating I did back those several months, finally! I promise to post a review either here or somewhere else if I would be lucky.

Anywho...just downloaded the music "Living inside the Shell" by Steve Conte for Ghost in the Shell stand.alone.complex OVA (second???), some Snow Patrol music and Long distance call by Phoenix. Recently, my passion for anime that I believed had been long gone is seemingly recalled again to life. I realized yakitate! japan is so cool and funny after long days of ignoring it in Hero. Even the popular funny anime Mirmo de Pon which I thought was too cutey for me (sort of like after CCS fashion with "No-brainer" element) made me really laugh. Ah, those good old days when I was addicted to Anime, joined contests, got autographs (I have an autograph of the maker of Blue Submarine 6), and raved over anime stuffs and spent hundreds and thousands of money just tto buy me friggin mags and cds. And now that I've mentioned it, I went to Mall of Asia this monday, a day after its official opening where I got to see the Comic Alley store's inside again after a long time. I promise to try to post a brief entry about my first step inside the Mall of Asia.

As another promise, I would like to post here (perhaps???) an essay I am doing regarding poor children and Poetry, after reading danton remoto's Pulotgata. Now how does that relate???

Anywho, I'm taking up the pen again and has been drawing realistic and anime-istic drawings in my sketch pad. I was worrying I'm letting what is left of my humble talent (if it is a talent in any way) go to waste...or something like that...think about rust.

Oh well, I just couldn't think of any decent entry and (evidently) title. However, I was thinking of creating another blog for my other interest: shounen-ai. hmmm....

and oh, I forgot...I watched Spielberg's War of the Worlds just this afternoon. I thought it was traumatic and freaky and plausible. Its scaring me in a different way, not the way horror movies scare you...it's just freaking me out...geez...

God save this anime!

2006-05-18T20:05:00.000-07:00

Look closely dear, don't they look promising? ;)

Animax shows a preview of the new upcoming Anime "God save our King" which they claim is crawling with bishonen! Oy, now that catches my attention! Bishonen you say? That word is enough to draw me to it with curiosity so I did a preliminary investigation of this anime-they-say-has-hunks. And son of a Turk! what do you know! the search for this anime stretched a smile to my ears! Man! it sure does have hand some guys! butnot only that, it has a hint of homosexuality! in our language dearies, it has a touch of shounen-ai/yaoi here for fun!

The story is about Yuri Shibuya who loves baseball and who was bullied into the girl's bathroom and dumped/shoved in the toilet which transports him to a wholly different, parallel world where he is thought of as the Demon King and is surrounded by an army of loyal, and *wiggles eyebrows* extraordinarily handsome young men who is bound to protect him and "his" in herited fantastical kingdom (duty bound to protect endangered dragons). Life and culture there is very, very different! A slap on the cheek means getting a MALE fiance which they consider normal (Yuri got engaged with a guy, if you want to know that), and as another reviewer puts it "Yuri better get better acquainted with the customs in the demon world before he gets in over his head. To think in the demon world if you slap anyone with an open palm on their left cheek it is a marriage proposal. If a knife falls down and you pick it up it is a challenge for a dual and if you pick up a fork (?) and point it at your opponent means you have taken their lover as your own....wierd hah?????" now that's music to the ears eh? fellow yaoi/shounen-ai fanatics.

But the anime is mainly humorous with a good plot, any suggested homosexuality between them is just "side stories" and are there to tickle your funny bones (I guess). One reviewer commented "it's like Fushigi Yugi on crack" now you get the drift xD

Sounds like an additional, future addiction to me...can't wait! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

that guy with the brown uniform and brown hair really catches my attention! hehehe!

later on...I found out his name his conrad!

Newfound Addiction

2006-05-18T19:35:00.000-07:00

Banzai! Full Metal Alchemist really caught me offguards and I'm falling all over this anime that really had me just by preview alone. And now that I watched it...I'm saying Yes! I love it! I love FMA! Al and Ed are cute! The whole package itself is darn amusing and well done. Animation, plot, characters, and music are a thumbs up for me. I've never had any addiction like this towards an anime, not since my beloved Fruits Basket. I already heard months ago even crossed its path years ago, FMA was or is a hit in US, so I presumed that it must be good and it really is. Now that's one of the animes worth watching in Animax. I like it so wholeheartedly I downloaded its upbeat ending theme that I really like: "Kesenai Tsumi" (Unforgivable/Unerasable sin) by Nana Kitade, how appropriate ne? Fun beat to get into.

And while I was surfing the net for the awesome anime, I came across this quiz and I was more than willing to take it.

Full Metal Alchemist Character Quiz

Alphonse Elric
Take this quiz!

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Aw, how noble! I'm Al! I always thought this kid is super cute, but I was rather expecting I have a more close resemblance to Edward because I can be quite reckless and short-tempered. But Al isn't too bad, I like him in fact. He's so darn cute!

The Local tourist

2006-05-10T08:15:00.000-07:00

I do not venture out of our house, much less venture to the corners and edges of Metro Manila. But when I arrived at Coastal (Roxas Blvd. peeps) , Manila; I sure felt like a tourist. If you are curious, the Coastal was once a part of Manila bay and had been heaped with fantastic amount of soil (equalling to a mountain)to create a sort of flat, smooth appendage of land. It is very stateside in atmosphere and appearance due to its spacious and immaculate grounds. We went to the "Blue Wave" Coastal and I looked around in amazement at the development of the place that had already existed during Ramos' presidential reign. The only downside of it is "itong ang unang guguho pag lumindol" as my brother-in-law puts it with a frown. But would you know that this is where the famous Mall of Asia stands. The pics I took of the Mall of Asia are not clear because I took it from inside our car.

doesn't that look familiar? like the one at Universal studios or something? You see the archipelago of the Republic of Philippines?

There is also that fascinating church built by Sy, near the bay.

feeling turista, syeeet, dyahe! hehehehe!

that's the center facade.

the front hall, sorta open foyer.

and of course the interior.

For others, it is just a rambling of a first timer, of a couch potato. But I would just like to credit the ambiance it sets on first timers like me, the ambiance of "so-stateside" so "social" and everything in its category. But hey, I'm just a local tourist. What do I know if you already had gone here, or perhaps is just prodded enough to be a little curious?

Whatever that may be, we retired at the end of the day, thinking what SM Mall of Asia looks inside, and as for me, how the does the bay look at the end of the road, just behind the mall.

An arch of the church.

Ay! ang peeling turista! behind me is the SM mall of Asia, standing before the church.

Rain that evoked an emotion

2006-05-10T07:35:00.000-07:00

I'm going mad with this hot weather! This intense heat that encases you wherever you place yourself to, at the corner, at the middle of the house...It is so maddening I wonder how it is in Africa? and how do the animals take it? How do the aborigines take it? they do go around nearly naked though...
Is it the end of the world? Is this a massive greenhouse effect being inflicted on us poor southeastern asians? Is the Antarctica already melting half as fast as an ice cube set on a hot tin roof? This is so insane! And evidently, it is taking over my mental health I'm going on a tirade here! But would you know that it rained this afternoon? The first Rain in May! Said to be miraculous enough to cure you. My sister burst into my room with a gleam in her eyes and told me that it is raining. Yeah, sure, I hear the rain...wait...

And before I know it, I went outside and stared at the overcast sky, feeling the first ever cold thing outside hit my face in thousands and thousands of teardrops. AT LAST! RAIN! After all the brain-melting summer season, rain, at last, comes to the aid of those who felt like being sizzled in the oven everyday, and even everynight. My sister,her husband and I went outside, completely soaked by the rain and walked all the way to our chapel out of liesure, and like it was the first time, it terribly astonished me how a naturally cold wind feel on my skin. For a second, it felt completely different, strange and alienating, yes, alienating, because I thought I was in another country where it is always cold and damp. For an hour, we stayed outside, reminiscing the days when we were children and were skipping about under the rain, with no cares for proper conduct. It really felt good--the rain. I silently rejoiced.

In this sickening heat that I will only love again in rainy season, the first rain, signalling the coming of storms and drizzles, is for a moment a mana from heaven. A snowstorm in the Sahara desert. A bright, clear sun in the siberian regions.

Driving Miss Daisy

2006-05-08T05:41:00.000-07:00

This afternoon I watched the 1989 movie “Driving Miss Daisy” starring Morgan Freeman, Jessica Tandy, and Dan Aykroyd. It is a critically acclaimed motion picture about a haughty southern Jewish widow and her unlikely friendship with a black man named Hoke Colburn played by Freeman. Dan Aykroyd plays as Daisy Werthan’s successful son who sees to it that his mother has a driver of her own, so he hires black man Hoke Colburn who previously did the same service to an elderly judge. Hoke proves himself handy, kind, and above all patient (which people now rarely possess towards the elderly). At first, Miss Daisy refuses to accept Hoke’s services with disdain and has been stubbornly prejudiced against him. But as time goes by, Miss Daisy finally sees Hoke as a worthy and special companion. It is a story of friendship between a white woman and black man set in the quiet state of Georgia (Atlanta) in 1950s where black people serve the white people as menial workers like drivers, laborers and house maids. It is also a portrayal of prejudice towards the black folks and possibly, the jews too. Acting performance is flawless, roles splendidly performed by Freeman and Tandy. The music and screenplay is good, very touching. The movie itself nearly moved me to tears. Surprisingly I had no side comments all throughout the movie, it shows how seriously I was hooked with the story.

The film won four academy awards: Best Picture, Best Actress (Jessica Tandy), Best Screenplay, and Best make-up. The film was based on the play by Alfred Uhry. This is movie that is worthwhile to watch for people who are seeking inspiring, sentimental drama with a touch of comedy. So better watch it this coming rainy season or I’ll "leap from our house and snatch you baldheaded". Heh.

Haha! worship me!

2006-04-27T05:57:00.000-07:00

You scored as Artemis. You are Artemis - goddess of the hunt

Artemis

80%

Athena

60%

Hera

60%

Aphrodite

40%

What Greek goddess are you? (Females Only) (PICS)
created with QuizFarm.com

Just as I expected...yay!

Euphoria for Euphorbias

2006-04-27T04:48:00.000-07:00

If plants were to be people and people have the so-called "It-girl" or "Flavor of the month", then I can say that Euphorbias are the current rage among garden-keepers and housewives alike. I can no longer ignore the apparent respects and admiration the people are paying this flower, especially when my mother herself is buying these species. In fact, earlier this day I accompanied my mother to buy some euphorbias of varying colors and [flower/petal] structure. Even my aunts are crazy about this plant. Whenever we have a gathering of sorts, they would talk all day of Euphorbias, pots, euphorbias, vitamins, euphorbias...blah blah blah. I would smile mildly at them whenever they are in their state of ethusiasm over this stock-still creatures. My mother asked me (in front of my aunt) if I find the Euphorbias we have at our home lovely and charming, I answered her an honest-to-goodness, flat NO, no I don't find them very pleasing at all unless they flower abundantly and in rich clusters. My mother gave me a slightly disparaging look, while my aunt gave a good-natured laugh. Honestly, I don't find them beautiful, not as beautiful as the rose, nor pleasing as the carnations, they are the kind that don't get your attention quickly, the kind that pauses you before you even wonder whether it's lovely or not. It is just not so eye-catching, that's all.
But sooner or later, I know that I will like this flower. I will appreciate them even if at first glance I thought they have this resemblance with cabbages and lettuces.
Today, my mother bought three pots of euphorbias, adding to five she has back home. She jokingly told me that we already have 8 pots of Euphorbias and we still have 1, 992 Euphorbias to see.
For some time now, i find their conversation about it a little fascinating, hearing the terms "Chuchita, Lucky, and Mocha" mentioned every once in awhile. For the clueless, I th ink these terms refer to the types of Euphorbias (the way their flowers are structured, that is.) If you'll ask me, I like the Chuchita.

But if you were going to ask me what plants I would love to have in my future garden, that would be herbs. I love these plants. Aside from looking simply charming, they are way convenient. We have a basil plant that has grown full-blown. I'm waiting to have an oregano and Tarragon plant in our garden.

Antique book???

2006-04-26T04:19:00.000-07:00

An hour ago I was re-arranging my books in the shelf when for the hundredth time the book "Homestead on the Hillside" by Mary J. Holmes caught my eyes and...rather inquisitive attention. The book itself looked worn with its cloth like cover wearing out on its edges and the moss-green color fading, the spine was a little chafed at the top but not entirely detached. On the cover was a picture of a lovely 19th century english woman, it was a little creased and light (faded probably). The paper is in fine condition but delicate, easily torn. I bought it from a book sale and it took me half an hour thinking whether to buy it or not because, truth is, it wasn't so handsome to buy. But hey, if it's sold 80 pesos, why not?

Before blogging in here, I decided to conduct a little research, it turned out that the author lived during the 19th century (1800s) but then again most authors lived during that time and they still have brand new books in stores. But hers appeared to be of no great significance, you can not find any books of hers in bookstores such as ours (but then again, our bookstores are always lacking, to my deepest chagrin). I even catalogued for it in the UST lib, and no results were found. Type it in google search engine, and what comes up are auction sites selling her book published in 1900s, not even a synopses could be found. Bottom line? it isn't so famous. Another bottom line? I think my book, judging from its very yellowing appearnce that would look so noble in any museum glass, is an antique. If the four digit number written on one of its front page is a date, then I could very well be the current owner of a 94 year old book. To a normal person, what does it matter? They sell a 1900 book of Holmes for 6 dollars, equivalent to 300 pesos (by 50 exchange rate) more or less, so it doesn't make any overwhelming difference.

But for me, it is strangely astounding. To buy an almost century old book for only 80 pesos. Now that's a difference...by numbers.

Marginal overhaul

2006-04-22T03:30:00.000-07:00

I'm afraid I lost that same old urge to write in my journal out of laziness, but here I am, trying to revive that old spirit of writing nonstop to hone my writing ability. I'm trying to keep the unusually wise words a gay person I met years ago.

I am not going on a hiatus. Merely, I am overtaken by this passionate reverence to HBO original series Rome--a treat for history buffs like me; and That 70's show in Jack tv. Imagine me lounging on our couch all brain-melting afternoon right before our tv screen with my brains....with my brains...not melting at all but my muscles getting all atrophied.

So I haul myself--the recent couchpotato from the couch that had now seemed fused to my behind--to the computer monitor to update things from my...not-so-existent life. I decided to give my journal a new look, a new name, and a new url in a week or two, working on Adobe photoshop 7.0 and getting the hang of CSS and the like. Fighting the urge to be a nomadic writer again, I decided on a slight overhaul--meaning the old entries are to stay and stay catalogued under Archives (I will not remove them) ideas and subjects remain, but theme and appearance will change. Hint hint *Cats*.

So for my dear single, loyal reader, be informed that if you are still interested in my dull existence and would still pursue my narrations even to the ends of the earth, be informed that my url is to be changed. I'm hiding from someone...hehe

Please proceed...

2006-04-09T05:59:00.000-07:00

Checked my online grades yesterday and before I clicked on the Log-In button I felt like doubling over and vomitting...geez I was so anxious...and frightened.

To my relief though, I passed. I did not get a flat one but neither did I get a 3, miraculously, because I firmly believed that I incurred a grade of three in American Lit which is honestly not my fault. I tell you.

However, like I said I passed! and I'm so glad. It feels like a huge boulder of doubts and fears that has been plaguing me for weeks had been lifted off from my shoulders and I could breathe freely again until classes starts again on June.

Gotta dash now...Gospel of Judas in National Geo would start any minute now. Wouldn't miss this for the world.

The forgotten library

2006-04-01T01:22:00.000-08:00

When I was reviewing American Literature before finals, I repeatedly encountered the name William Kennedy. I wouldn't bother one bit if not for the entailing title "Ironweed", his novel. I remembered that I did see the word "Ironweed" somewhere. It was mentioned in a book I had read by William Kennedy, and during that time, I didn't know who William Kennedy is. In my AMerican lit reader, William Kennedy is one of the noted writers in the Contemporary period.

I first read one of his works in our high school library. I was in my fourth year and favoring myself one last book before I walk, permanently, out of this infernal school. I happened to see a single copy of "Quinn's Book" [1988] collecting dust in its inconspicuous place. The cover itself interested me (it was a hardbound), and when I read the synopses at the back, I thought it was nothing much. But I did take it.

When I entered Literature in College. I began to count off mentally the stories and poems that baffled me. I learned that it takes much more than the eyes could see, it was "critical analysis", it was "feeling it", "groping through it", and like one of my professors said, "unearthing it" and "investigating it like Sherlock Holmes". It was more than seeing, it was understanding . Reading between the lines.

Upon knowing just recently that I had read one of William Kennedy's books whose "Ironweed" won a pulitzer award. I suddenly feel regretful. Regretful that I didn't read it so well (although I finished it), couldn't even recall the story, and even if I did, I still wouldn't grasp the story so well. However, I did write some things regarding the book on a piece of paper which, one day, my mother saw and threw in the trashbin. What was left of my connection to the book was gone.
Until the UST library, of course...

There's this reason why I wrote "The forgotten library" as the title of my entry. Our high school library is not as busy looking as the UST library (natch...), it is small, dim, empty, and usually the librarian is out (and I regretted I didn't steal a book while she is out just for keepsakes, I mean, once in a while, in our perfectly ordered lives unstained of anything, we should be committing some petty crimes! just to season it). Only a few go there intent on reading books, others go there to divulge their deepest secrets, or to play chess, or just to have some peace of mind (but I doubt it). Before I left St. James, I thought the next batch was a tad too distracted with pop culture, so I foresaw that they wouldn't do anything much with a book when there is fun around, and by fun I mean the rage the testosterone and hormones go into (boys, girl, dalliance...etc...). THe books are covered with dust (let's face it), old, yellowed, ignored at. But I loved it. Although it lacked some books. It is where I first read Austen's Pride and Prejudice, Bronte's Jane Eyre, a book I forgot the title but was the basis for the movie "Homeward bound", and attempted to read Dumas' The Three Musketeers which I was not able to because someone was reading it, and that someone who is utilizing that single copy is a close friend of mine.

this library is not loved. When I recall it in my mind, I see it as a small room with dull-looking books sitting very quietly on its place, uncomplaining. It is dim and empty. And the dates on the cards go way, way back and an occassional reader would only stamp its paper every four years, inbetween, books are quiet, unable to tell their stories. Mute.

But thank god, I heeded some of this quiet calls, because if not, I wouldn't be able to read alot of books (that means Kennedy's Quinn's Book) which now I am grateful to have read, even if I only had a hazy understanding of it.

It's still not vacation!

2006-03-25T04:40:00.000-08:00

It took me a day and a half to shake off the horrors of the finals from my system before I could go on with my vacation--as you can see I lost one week worth of posting but right now I don't feel like hooting and shouting Finally! summer! not in this god-forsaken hot-pot of a place, and definitely not before the dreaded clearance day where you are not assured of passing in USTe, especially when you found yourself scratching your head and cursing your professor to perdition with his/her extravagantly difficult exam.

However, now that I have the time, I am working on my whoohoo--800 songs in my pc I paisnstakingly gathered and compiled (and I thank Akie alot!!!), ranging from Alternative rock music to instrumental and classical ones--and it's still growing (I also collect reggae music, so if you have any suggestions I might download, please do tell me.) Furthermore, I've been indulging myself in LimeWire, downloading music from movies (shrek 2, pulp fiction, etc, you name it), and now that I mentioned it, I also prepared a list of old movies I am going to watch, check this out:

1. Ben-Hur - starring Charlton Heston. He also starred in the Cecil B. DeMille's the Ten Commandments where actress Anne Baxter playing the role of Nefertiti (yata) kept pronouncing his name Moses like she had swallowed a dozen of ecstasy pills, or was having a constant hysteria, or better yet, suffering from a fever.
2. Casablanca - shamefully, I haven't watched this film, obviously.
3. The Graduate - uh...do I need to elaborate on this??? Go ask your parents about this movie.
4. Modern Times - Ah yes! starring Charlie Chaplin! the tramp who I once fantasized myself inlove with.
5. One flew over the cuckoo's nest - starring Jack Nicholson. I would venture confidently that this is a good film.
6. Rebecca - based on Daphne Du Marier's novel of the same title.
7. Roman Holiday - similar to that koreanovela "Princess Lulu". a seemingly imitation of the earlier film "It happened One night" which I loved.
8. Schindler's List - hmm...serious movie. Been warned against it.
9. Singing in the rain - yes, from where the famous tune "I'm singing in the rain...tralalalala!" came.
10. Taxi Driver - starring Jodie Foster. Very interesting. Been recommended.
11. To kill a mockingbird - another recommendation, based on Nelle Harper Lee's novel of the same title.
12. Camille - starring Greta Garbo. A romantic, tragic drama. Heard my cousin cried over this movie.
13. Mr. Deeds goes to town - no, not the movie starring Adam Sandler. This is the original one, the earlier version. Now you know.

Unfortunately, the rest of the list are the movies my uncle doesn't have. So if ever someone has these titles and would be kind enough, please lend it to me. Now.

14. His girl friday
15. Letter from an unknown woman
16. A night at the opera
17. Sunrise
18. Top Hat
19. Cabaret
20. The Heiress
21. Now, Voyager
22. The Red shoes
23. A room with a view

Unfortunately though, I haven't started with any of these yet. Not until I get my grades on 10. Until that, I have every right to feel anxious. Plus, I am looking for a job. I kind of need the dough.

So it's still not vacation, but when I accompanied my mother to a friend of his who sells fishes straight from Romblon, seeing those huge, exotic fishes made me long for white sands, fine beaches, sunsets, exotic food, and good-looking surfers.
*sigh* those old days when I was in Palawan. Good ol' palawan. I wanna return there. *sigh*

away with you, play station!

2006-03-14T22:02:00.000-08:00

Temptations are the hardest things to ignore. You can ignore (at least, pretend) your crush, ignore your dog, ignore your neighbor, ignore your mother, or ignore the jeepney driver but it seems that in my case, I can't help myself with temptations such as my Play station.

Yesterday, I came home, intent on reviewing article VI and article VII when I found my sister playing with my long lost playstation (the smaller, feminine, curvaceous version) she unearthed somewhere. I slightly reprimanded her for "utilizing" my things without my permission but not without snatching the controller from her and started playing myself, complaining and blaiming her for distracting me.

So I played the afternoon with Tomb Raider II, Pepsi Man, Dracula II, Rhapsody and realizing with horror that the cds of games like Harvest Moon, Bust a Move, Legends of Mana, and Final Fantasy 9 are missing. Playing my PS was like reuniting with an old ex-flame finding that it was still fun and entertaining. I had forgotten the joys of playing ps.

This is our dog Ty, sleeping beside the PSI cds I tested (if it's still working) and the dark thing below is my skirt, apparently I was still in my uniform when I was playing.

Somewhat erratic.

2006-03-10T21:44:00.000-08:00

It's raining!

When summer has just arrived, it's raining! A good thing too because despite my inclination to sunny days than rainy days it's a blessing to feel cold than to feel like you were being fried...alive.

It's kind of erratic.

As unpredictable as the weather today, my mother also shifts mood faster than you could blink your eyes. This morning, she had been accomodating, mild-mannered, and indifferent. She let me sleep till lunch and did not pour a bucketful of water on my face (just a jest...okay?)to tell me that it's time to do my horrible household chores.

But when she recieved an abominable letter from something--or someone she shifted gears and played the I'm-a-bitch-so-don't-mess-with-me card and started noticing and pointing out even the most trivial things ever concieved in this world and saw them vile and impertinent. She launched an attack (a debate!) against bookish people, and naturally, I had to defend myself because I am a bookish person (in case you do not know), so we spiraled down to a debate about humanity and such, further digressing until we reached an argument about the nonsensical existence of "langka" or jackfruit in english, if you prefer.

I was planning to type a story that day but seeing her all worked up I could almost see steam emitting out of her ears, I decided to find some place where her injustly directed hot-headedness can't reach me. Instead of the rooms in the house, I began to like the idea of hanging out in our car with my four-legged confidantes. So I did.

It is fun and different from my usual locking up in a room. The door of our car is open and I could see the cloudy sky above that had abruptly turned to a sunny, clear, blue one with Bob Ong's Stainless Longganisa in my hands and enjoying every second of it. Good book, this one. Matched my mood and setting at that time. And then our good dogs accompanied me. Good creatures, them. Makes a good companion if you feel like loathing the whole mankind.

But I had to go inside and do my homeworks and munch what was left of the chocolate crinkles I am indulging myself with yesterday. And voila! my mother is back to her cool, mild attitude; she even asked me to buy a 500 liters cola for ourselves and ate away nuts and crinkles.

And now it's raining--actually it was raining hard a minute ago but it reduced itself to a drizzle.

That's weather and that's my mom, ladies and gentlemen. erratic.

Oh, honestly.

2006-03-10T05:08:00.000-08:00

In the entire course of my life, I've never appreciated nor been interested with a filipino soap opera that both ABSCBN and GMA7 offered to even picky viewers like me. But today, I'm honestly going to tell you that ABS' new soap opera "Sa Piling Mo" has caught my attention.

Despite the fact that One, I don't--and never liked Judy-ann and Piolo; and two, they have been appearing in soap operas (or movies for that matter) that is so hackneyed just hearing them talk and exchange saccharine sweet dialogues make me roll my eyes and scoot to the farthest place possible with corks in my ears, I like the soap opera they are acting on. As long as I didn't see and have an idea of the controversial "love-making" scene they reportedly did that would make mtrcb exclaim "susmaryosep!" I can watch the soap-opera everyday without too much criticism on my part.

What particularly caught my attention is the plot. Unlike Gulong ng Palad that starts with the very trite plot of poor girl-meets-rich boy, S.P.M. starts with poor girl-meets poor boy--and a destitute at that! A change, alleluia!

I like it when the two main characters/heroes are imperfect, physically or mentally or emotionally. Piolo's being blind is incentive enough to invoke interest in viewers (huh?), and Albert Martinez's role as the harsh, unkind son "Benicio" of the kind congressman adds spice to it because he is a good actor and I like the character he is portraying.

I've only watched two or three episodes because I'm not crazy about watching it everyday especially when schoolwork is demanding your whole attention. I just join my mother in her room whenever I have the spare time and she would be watching these soap-operas. Watching SPM reminds me the discussion we had with our Philippine Lit professor regarding the "Four Values of Philippine Drama" by Tiongson and I would carelessly search the SPM for any of the said values. Although it is another drama (that I hope is not too tear-jerking) with GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS involved again, it looks slightly different from the disappointing and depressing, typical soap operas. But honestly, I hoped they had entertained the thought of casting a diffrent hero and heroine because Judyann and Piolo is so.....exposed...so popular that you still see them as Judyann and Piolo and not as the characters they are portraying.

But the plot--not wholly different to me--is good enough for a change...for a start. But I could still see some traditional elements that I wish Filipinos would set aside for awhile. Elements that are so darned used it is too chafed--for me.

But of course, things change.There are soap operas that have good start-offs, goes well and ends well. But there are also teleserye that become worse and much worse as time goes by. I hope SPM is not one of this latter category. However, I'll try to watch it everyday and judge whether it is still good or not. Inquirer entertainment does note that it has good ratings.

for mitch

2006-03-09T04:59:00.000-08:00

Here's an example of the completely beautiful illustrations by Yoshitaka Amano. Leave me a message if you have seen it. thanks.

that's Dream--the BEST rendition I've ever come across with.

feels like hitting grass

2006-03-07T05:53:00.000-08:00

I don't know why I am typing an entry here, what I know is I made it as a rule to type interesting posts that is not too deep nor to shallow. But I'm here and I feel like pounding on the keys after that gruelling feat of typing the entire American Literature project--okay! I fess up! I was cramming, goddamit.

Now I had fallen into this kind of stupor--and trying to be alert as possible until I ram down the entire Linear equation in one and two variables down my throat, then choke on it on quiz day tomorrow. And then, I'll try to review the Article six of the friggin Philippine constitution so i could get what Gloria is trying to do and what is the fuss about the proclamation 1017 (tama ba?) that everybody is talking about--in radios, in tvs, in newspaper, blah blah blah...

There's no use--my blabbering here--it's not going to escalate the economy of the philippines to a staggering height, nor would it help a helpless, hapless soul somewhere in Middle east. I'm going.
I'm going. Study hard okay? Don't ever ever neglect your academics (now look who's talking) once I'm finished with all these harassing burdens, I'm going to spend the entire day watching old movies (I'll post the list here at the end of March), spend another day of sleep (and sleep like the dead), and heap another burden:

ya, it's summer job, dude.

Really?

2006-03-05T23:07:00.000-08:00

Ches --

[noun]:

A person of questionable sanity who starts their own cult

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

cool...righteous...

About Rustom

2006-03-01T07:06:00.000-08:00

I am the Love that dare not speak its name.

This is a quotation from Alfred Douglas "Two Loves" (Poem about homosexual love) that I love because whenever I read it, I remember gays. But this is homosexual love and what I am going to express here is a gay's story of his soul-searching etc...

I don't watch Pinoy Big Brother Celebrity Edition because I have this conviction (suspicion) that it is scripted, but if Rustom's controversial admittance of his gender is true, I gotta love him.

So I watched Rustom's narration of his traumatic childhood. The story itself--of his dressing a girl's dress (at an early age!) his father's rage, his mother's slashing words and its effect on him made the whole story tragic and bittersweet. This event led him to an identity crisis, or gender confusion or whatchamacallit, he married a woman who loved him--loved an idea that he was all manly and heterosexual but eventually ended up in tears and her shunning him.

I remember the time when his wife came bawling on a certain talk show, telling everyone that she and Rustom had some misunderstanding (she won't name)and they are breaking up. I thought then that Rustom was an insensitive bastard. Too bad, I thought, I kind of find him handsome and chaming. Now years later, he reveals the story that is completely astonishing. THIS is SOME revelation he made.

When he narrates that he went to the states to search for his identity, he said that homosexuality come in different forms and sizes and I applaud him for saying that because he is right, being gay is not dressing in women's clothes, squealing like a girl, applying make-up, and acting with women's grace; you can be a gay and act and dress like any ordinary man! In fact, I like those type of gays than transvestites (I'm not saying I abhor them).

The moment where a huge Mariposa landed on his feet is very intriguing and mysterious. oldies say it's a spirit of a beloved who came to carry a message. And I was thinking that it could be his father...apologizing. But then it could be his grandmother who carried him after he was beaten (with an--ouch--belt buckle--that's gotta hurt like hell).

All I know is, his revelation--if it's true--garnered respect and admiration from me. He speaks for all of the gays out there--who are despised and subdued and physically/mentally/emotionally abused. Getting to know and witness a gay's confession of his true feelings made me love homosexuals the more. I believe that they are not disgusting nor sinful (God, forgive me), the way I look at them, they have this unique depth, the image of a man's strength and a woman's softness fused into one personality; one identity that the society (not all, though) despises and is subjected to many discriminations and prejudices, etc...

Rustom's sudden emotional burst-out will earn many a good and bad reactions, but the thing is, he let it out--he came out, he finally told to himself and to the rest of the world that he's gay, he's gay, he's gay, he's gay.

where's me cheeseburger?

2006-02-28T04:22:00.000-08:00

Finally, the weary travelers come home. When I saw that they did not carry any take-home food like McDonalds, I felt like launching a bitter attack, "And where's my doublecheeseburgeronionringsapplepietwofrenchfriesbigmacupsizedcokepluschocolatesundae
withadditionalspaghettichickenjoymealpizzameltpietwopiecebrugersteakandmcchickensandwisch
huh???" just to soothe my envious heart. But before I could retort a line like this my mom stuffedme with spoils--delicious "pasalubong"s and my heart leaped with joy. She presented me with five gothic keychains (voodoo dolls?), two bags, a knitted cap, a knitted hairband (the likes of which Uma wears or wore), a dreamcatcher, a plastic jar of choco flakes and other delicacies (strawberries!), and of course...a pack of "sundot-kulangot." (prod-booger???)

Aw, I couldn't hate them.

But my mother prodded my poor, wounded...er...conscience(?) when she went into torrents of passionate narration: "Ay naku! sayang ka talaga! Ang sarap ng pagkain dun! Na-miss nga kita bigla e kasi masarap yung sizzling dun pati yung pizza! Naalala nga kita! (ano ako? patabain baboy?!)Ay! you missed half of your life (aba, nag english!)"
To which I replied, "Hindi no! kung sumama ako e di, hindi ko nagawa yung research ko, e di na de-bar ako, I will miss my whole life (down the drain...)!"
and then she rattled on and on about celebrities she saw there namely Jason and Franzen, Judy-ann, Kristine Hermosa, and Diether-the-closet-queen, blah blah blah...
Hearing her, I though she was going to have an epileptic attack
geez...

Sarrah and I finished the last pages of our research (ihahabol kay mam). She brought me to this small, simple, unpopulated, and not-so-famous computer cafe. I've been there once, but when I entered it again, I found out, by looking around because I was bored, that there were stacks of books against the wall above the door and near the ceiling, covered with thick dust. Just looking at them filled me with enthusiasm and holy curiosity I lovingly possess. I asked the woman at the counter about it and she told me that they are selling the books for twenty and fifteen bucks (thick and thin)Twenty bucks? You got to be kidding...

I spotted Marl Twain's Roughing It but my eyes were drawn to a rotting, old book. This book I chose to purchase: Stephen King "Gerald's Game". I'm more than happy to acquire another book (I don't really care about its apearance as long as the whole book is intact. But ironically, I love books with good covers)and to read another horror-filled suspense, thriller story. The book looked really old and dirty but that can be fixed, as long as its ME I can fix the book right up and make it look at least admirably clean if not immaculately new.

Recalling the simple event, looking at books like that, those type of books that look dirty and veiled with dust, especially thick ones brings in me that excitement, the fact that I'm looking at those books, those worlds I haven't immersed myself into through reading. I felt adventuous and giddy.

That's why if you took me to an age old library with a helluva lot of books that smell of dust (and fungi...just kidding...) with the most absurd titles, I'm pretty sure I'm going to faint with bliss. Take me there abd I'll forever love you for it.

What a dreary world...

2006-02-26T21:18:00.000-08:00

Someone is drilling the wall opposite me and my home-based pc, and its sound is grating on my nerves.

You would have noticed (by now)that i was not posting any entries regarding the Ultra tragic, Leyte Tragic, even the Crane tragic (although no one died, luckily...),and the Coup issue.
Man, I've got to be honest. I want to write about them but I'm not sure AND confident that I could do one. It depresses the hell out of me. I'm afraid my view of everyday life is so...distorted and I don't want that manifesting in my serious posts. However, I'm planning to read all about the Coup d' etat that was busted (I heard)because it scaring me shitless, and I want to say my opinions on it, biased or not.

I could hear a godzilla-like cry on the wall. Must be the neighbor fixing something on the wall, but I desperately wish he wouldn't be so loud. But talk about this noise, the guttural sound fo the drill, the intermittent thud of a hammer brings to my mind the dullness of life, the continuous sound, predictable, you could sing a tune with it. That is life right now, even today, the weather looks sullen...a dreary life, monotonous like the sound of a hammer, drilling into your happiness you crafeully construct around you...only to be disturbed by a certain malaise our government exude, an illness they claim is incurable.
Is it?

That's life getting into your veins, you see things representing life, even the most simple, uncomplicated things.

I am only worried that you think I'm an insensitive, superficial writer.

Anyway, *winks eye* you don't give a shit as to what people say about you.

All by myself...not...but still

2006-02-25T05:08:00.000-08:00

*Note: try to read this entry fast, without pauses because you'll understand it more, BECAUSE I was typing this entry as fast as I can...

I stayed up all night till three something A.M. because I'm so aware of the fact that for the second time, I'm, again, the master of the house. Family left to baguio and I'm left with our helper and...ack...to my consternation...my brother-in-law (aaargghhh...)who co-exist with me in our house...how disappointing.

Anyway, so the fact that I have the reigns over my life means I can sleep whenever I want to or eat whatever I want to or do whatever I want to like, for example, stay secluded all day in the room playing Empire Earth (which I installed in my notebook in the name of *ehem* history) and listening to my mp3 I transferred earlier. Mom and the folks will be back on Sunday or Monday but I wish they would come back earlier even if that means shortening my absolute mastery over the house...blech...

So last night, I stayed until 3 A.M. munching chocolate chip cookies my mom (I believe) intentionally left as a consolation for my being left out in the Baguio trip. She called though to inform me that she had tasted the infamous "sundot-kulangot" which I first encountered in Bob Ong's Stainless Longganisa. Talking about books, I also read Taguan-Pung at Manwal sa mga Nagpapagal ni Eros Atalia and Jessica Zafar's Twisted 6 alternately (thanks K-ann).
As a result of my daring feat, I was zonked out all morning.

I do remember that K-ann and Mitch demands my Top Ten list of hotties. I already drafted one but I caught a couple of movies this afternoon and decided to revise it...later...so that means (to K-ann and Mitch) that my top ten list would be a little delayed than expected.

Short but Sweet

2006-02-16T01:33:00.000-08:00

I did this tower of books just this afternoon, after I came home. Whenever I'm home, I sort of do this habitual ritual of mine--that is--worshipping my books before proceeding on my school stuffs...

Maybe it was to alleviate my stress that I began to have this idea of piling one book after another, carefully...

After several failures, I was able to make it stand steadily on the table...

My mom caught me doing this, "Ano ba yang ginagawa mo??? " with matching exasperated look.
I shot her a smug look, "Humph, kaya mo ba gumawa nitong tower of books?!?!"
She went out...after which I was constructing another building of books that looks strikingly like a ziggurat or a pyramid, albeit not perfectly.

Then my mom sauntered back. She noticed the intense, determined look on my face and slyly approached the table I was working on, grabbed a book, and like a mean; rude girl flung the book like a boomerang upon my wonderful work. After seeing it crumble down, she gave me a victorious look and walked away.

AAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggghhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! Dammit!!!

Of course, I built it back and snapped a shot of it before my mom walks back and ruin my opus all over again.

It was fun! really. made me feel light and focused.

For Klarizz...

2006-02-14T02:32:00.000-08:00

Just this morning I recieved the most shocking news of my life: Klarizz, one of my closest and rarest friend since second year had died yesterday at nine o' clock.

What hurt the most is that I'm the last person in my barkada to know. Karen Briones was the one who informed me, how bad could it get?

Her death was so sudden. I didn't know, I really didn't. I didn't feel it...and she didn't want anyone to know that she was dying, she had been hiding his sickness all along since second year. What kind of a friend am I? not knowing that she has lung cancer.

Jesus, Klarizz, why did you have to die so young, after your 18th birthday, before Valentines, and before MY bithday?

And I didn't get to say goodbye...when was the last time I saw you? six? eight? eleven months ago? Since when was the last time I talked to you? asking why you had quit school? Why not tell us you had cancer?

I couldn't cry anymore. I was a total blank. speechless, not knowing how to react even Karen was somewhat urging me to cry...

Isn't it an insult? I was walking down our street with a bouquet of flowers for my mother this valentine afternoon with the sun shining and the sky so clearly blue just to recieve the call and confirm that you really is lost to us...forever...

I'm so sorry Klarizz...but I'm going to miss you like hell...you were the only friend I had who really understood me, never had a fight with me. You were the girl I always ask "Bakit ka laging nakangiti???" and you would say that when a person smiles, that person stays younger and pretty. And yes, you were so pretty, I always tell you and you would laugh and humbly shrug it away.

Shit Klarizz, you left so abruptly...

What is it like up there Klarizz?

Klarizz thank you for all...thank you.

I'll miss you...

the shoe-shiner

2006-02-13T02:22:00.000-08:00

I was musing inside the jeep (again) on my way home when the jeep momentarily stopped after the red traffic light. So I was musing, when I suddenly felt something soft and smooth being rubbed against my (faux) leather school shoes. I was surprised to see a small boy of possibly ten or eight or nine years kneeling on the aisle of the jeep, and pushing himself on his knees while swiftly cleaning the shoes of every passenger inside the jeepney (he sweeped even the sandals-wearing feet) without any preliminaries or questions like "Would you like me to shine your shoes, that is, for one peso...?". He just went inside the jeepney and started shining everyone's shoes. I didn't pull back of course I was too curious and shocked at the sight. THe first of it's kind. A couple of high school girls at the end pulled back in horror upon seeing (and feeling) the boy shining their shoes. they were so surprised.
The boy stood up, looked at the people, expecting even just a peso, but nobody paid attention to him (Prof Macapagal did talk about beggars that are being ignored just this morning...how coincidental...). I thought I would give him some money but honestly, I was also reluctant (I am not running for the sainthood candidacy, so I am being honest). I had twelve pesos in my pocket and the next jeepney fare would cost me about eight pesos, but I can't give him the five pesos because that would leave me seven pesos, but I decided that I would give him the two pesos (at least, or five pwede rin, bahala na yung driver) but he had already gotten off the jeep with his two grimy hands on his hair looking as if he was on the verge of insanity.

It was too late, even though I already had my hands fishing in my pocket...

"Pabihi-bihirang hagisan ng malas
at lalong maramot ang tapon ng habag,
walang bumabati at kung may maglimos ay waring pauyam,
ang ganti'y taimtim na pasasalamat at maikling dasal;
sa agos ng buhay, siya'y isang layak
na pati ang awa ng kapwa'y paglibak."

- Amado Hernandez "Ang Pulubi sa puno ng Tulay"

Santigwar!

2006-02-11T02:16:00.000-08:00

I SERIOUSLY need to learn my natice vernacular! I must! I have to have two interpreters (my mom and our helper)beside me just to understand this. My mom jokes I'm a hilaw-na-bikolana. Sounds degrading but what do I care? I'm trying anyway. Now, I need to contact my cousin back in my province to get me a copy...hmm...

Jeepney Stories...and the power of Geography

2006-02-09T22:15:00.000-08:00

Bumpy Ride

I wanted to strangle the jeepney driver yesterday for driving rough. Is he so stupid to realize that there are delicate people like me inside his jeepney? What if he turned left or right and somebody got thrown off? He drives the jeep like a bat out of hell, after a daredevil fashion. We kept bouncing off our seats and my butt hurt, because he won't step on the brakes whenever there are humps ahead. I was surprised we didn't fly into the air like a spring, reach the mountains and fall back and then get squashed or killed or something.(--no, enough, that's too grisly). I tried to shot him with a murderous glare but the asswipe was too absorbed with his craft, that is, driving like hell.

Sparks

I noticed the jeepney I rode in this early, freezing morning was...hmmm...emitting ember like sparks below. I couldn't figure out why (was there a metal scraping the concrete?) but I was sure as hell scared that it might ignite the gas and explode us to oblivion and beyond. I kept staring at it, hoping that someone would notice my catatonic look and take a look for himself and sorta ask the driver-guy about it. But like me, one particular man saw it and stared at it like it was the most intriguing in the whole bedamned world. Of course, nobody raised an alarm or an issue about it. The guys who noticed it earlier and had alighted from the jeep just stared at it with a combination of horror and fascination as we sped away. I was too happy to have gotten off the jeep the moment we reached the wet market (where I board my daily fx). I was beginning to think that this is a mad world and I'm getting a helluva lot of it through my jeepney rides.

The POwer of Geo

And yesterday, I was standing and waiting for the library elevator when I felt, felt with the ultramagnetic pores of my skin an eminent person placing herself behind me. I could feel without looking that that person behind me is someone I know and somebody who could command authority and strike fear in students' hearts. When I managed to slip a glance, getting inside the elevator, I knew then that it was Ma'am Geography. 1Lit students would instantly know who I am alluding to. It is just so funny how this professor could extend her aura without any physical contact. If only she wasn't so sensitive to everything (external stimuli), I would have stared at her for hours inside the elevator. That's how fascinated I am with her. Fascination laced with admiration and cool annoyance.

ZZZZZ...snore

2006-02-06T23:15:00.000-08:00

Recently, I've made a habit of dozing inside Jeepneys (in fact, I do not board fxs homeward, due to money scrimping. jeeps are a lot cheaper) just hours ago, I instantly woke up when nodding my head, I heard a loud, dull thud against the curved metal at the rear of the jeep, and then I felt a sharp throbbing at the right-back portion of my head. Someone was looking at me, giving me that look that says I'm either stupid or clumsy, but I also thought he was trying to repress a laugh. Turns out that I tilted my head far back that when the jeep lurched, I hit the metal hard, shaking me from my rather delicious slumber (don't worry, i did not feel so comfortable to drool)

Yeouch.

O Botticelli!

2006-02-02T03:59:00.000-08:00

I was suppose to post this entry two days ago but two unfortunate things hindered my commencement of this entry: One, I lost the paper where I listed Caravaggio's and Botticelli's works; and two, I am a confessed and deliberate shirker of duties and lazy-ass. The phone went out and I wouldn't bother myself to fix the lines for the dial-up until now.

the topic for today is the long post-poned, supposedly-due-monday, brief analysis-appreciation of Botticelli, Sandro Botticelli. Now, if you don't know him, you either should read Blood and Gold by Anne Rice (Marius is the protagonist here) or take Art studies, OR take Western Civ (if you don't mind the blood-clotting lectures)

Caveat Lector: For non-artists like you, o dear reader, I tell you not to proceed lest you find yourself yawning and thinking "What in Hell is this bore typing about? Doesn't she have any valuable entries to type???" So go away if you find the prospect of talking somebody else's work that you are not interested in, much less acquianted with, Boring.

And for those Art connoisseurs, I entreat you to go away too, if you don't want your veins and arteries to pop at such short, idiotic comments I presented here. I am not aspiring to be an accurate art critic.

I had fun exploring through the Humanities section again, as I always find whenever I have some free time to spare. I chanced upon Botticelli gathering dust below the shelf, sitting next to the equally ignored genius Fra Angelico (he was mentioned in my valuable book Vittorio by Anne Rice as Mr. Botticelli was in Blood and Gold) and the storm-like appearance of Caravaggio. Of course, I initially made my acquiantances with Mr. Sandro Botticelli of the famous Birth of Venus.

It was fun touring through his...er...portfolio. To see the almost realistic but soft touch in Madonna of the Rose Bush; the beautiful plate of Madonna with St. Cosmas [St. Damian and other Saints]; the horrid, gory portrayal of Discovery of the Murder of Holofernes related to the juxtaposed plate Judith with the Head of Holofernes; there is also the strangely beautiful and serene woman in Madonna of the Eucharist; the thin but comely youth with lotsa arrows sticking through him in the plate St. Sebastian; the languid, feminine look on the face of Lorenzo the Magnificent's brother: Portrait of Giuliano de' Medici (now, if you really read Vittorio you will be familiar with the Medicis) who was assassinated; the very familiar Primavera where Venus, the graces, their leader Mercury, Chloris turned Flora, and her pursuant Zephyr stars; the archaic looking plate of Scenes from the Life of Moses; my favoritie Madonna of the Magnificant where handsome, youthful angels gather around the Madonna (reminds me of Amadeo); the intriguing Portrait of a Young Man with his direct, compelling look; the Villa Lemmi Fresco [Young Woman and four mythological figures] where you can stare at beautiful women; the VERY familiar Venus and Mars which turns out as the cover of Anne Rice's novel Blood and Gold where it is shown that "Venus--Love masters and appease Mars but Mars never master Venus" (Marsilio Ficino); Madonna of the Pomegranate--where we can see again the familiar, comely, youthful angels (of which the gender I am uncertain about) gathering around HER again, and where I learned that Lilies is the emblem of Florence, and then we see these youthful angels again except that they are accompanied by a much older and mature looking angel garbed in a handsome black armor by the far right in the plate Altarpiece of San Barnaba; meanwhile, the plate St. Augustine's Vision [of the Child on the Shore] strikes me, the story behind this plate was used by Sir Dator in one of his discussion; and lastly Pieta--a beautifully rendered plate of Jesus' freed from the cross (and Mary fainting from utter grief?).

All these plates were beautiful and interesting to look at, on my second venture I could almost memorize/identify them. On my return, I shall venture a new conquest (and possibly an entry) on Caravaggio's works which are more softer and realistic, and of course, the works of Fra Angelico.

If you are interested to see the plates, google them. I did not provide links here because, like I said, I'm a shirker of duties.

Me and Jerry--a nonsensical interaction.

2006-01-28T21:15:00.000-08:00

One time, I was reviewing Western Civ one, late, classic night. I was propped against the foot of the couch (or sofa, if you prefer), my foot and derriere on a huge pillow on the carpeted floor under the glorious yellow light of our chandelier, listening to Mouret's Rondeau, Handel's The Water Music, and the rest of the peer (the cd is actually "Smart Symphonies" a collection of classical music meant for babies to stimulate their brain's development, from Mead-Johnson Nutritionals) when I noticed something creeping beside me--a few inches away. It was a mouse oblivious to my still form (I was still because I was seriously pondering Alexander the Great) but when we both looked at each other, I let out a muffled scream and IT jumped a couple of inches into the air, before scrambling back under the couch I was leaning on.

Sounds rubbish? I thought so. It's nothing grand.

But it's not like everyday I get to interact with the "other" inhabitants of our house.

P.S. Mitch, I think I know what the novel you are referring to one day by Anne Rice. It is a novel written by someone who had undergone a drastic change of views. Sudden Change of Heart notwithstanding It looks to be a mighty interesting book to read. hmmm....also check out the play they have for Lestat (Huuuuwaaaattt???)

Pacquiaowin ang lahat.

2006-01-27T03:52:00.000-08:00

Pacquiao is eveyrwhere! It's Pacquiao mania! You can hear him as an empanada, his song is a hit, he is a top search in search engines, and a news just informed us that his name is one of the top in ebay, everybody worships him, everybody loves him!

Well, why not? I guess he deserved it. As long as it doesn't go into his head and bloat it.

Don't get me wrong, I don't hate him. It's just that his complete rise to immense popularity is making my head spin a little. Every word, every breath of every people is "Pacquiao" Pacquiao here, Pacquiao there. I hear his now-famous song almost everyday in the radios of the fx(s). Drivers would talk all about Pacquiao: pacquiao, GMA, Pacquiao, a little bit of GMA, and Pacquiao.

It just amazes me, it is nearly overwhelming.

You want more of him? drown yourself here

***
Footnote: It's been a week of a somewhat erratic, but mostly wet, weather. A week of drizzle, rain, and abrupt sunshine. But the point is, rain continuously fall on an already damp, reeking, decaying land.

I sooo hooked.

2006-01-23T05:53:00.000-08:00

Four things I found I'm hooked about...again...

I. Where art thou, Twilight???

I dropped by my cousin's this saturday and rummaged (without permission, of course, hehe) through her things and found Meg Cabot's Haunted (The mediator book 5). Haunted is not, exactly, just a pocketbook for really, young adults and people my age whose innocence-is-not-yet-lost through reading adult romance story and would find this love story-pocketbook utterly sweet and cool. Although I already know what really lies between a man and woman relationship other than and beyond those innocent kisses, i still find the book refreshing, cool, and sweetly funny. I'm so hooked again with Meg Cabot's books (she's the author of The Princess Diaries series). After rereading Haunted, I so wanted to read the (probably last)latest mediator book: twilight. Will Susannah have her happily-ever-after ending? Will paul ever cease to haunt Suze? Will Jesse choose to die to love her or live without her??? Will they ever???

please, could anyone tell me? I'm dying to know. Does someone have (or read) the mediator series, especially the Twilight?

II. Touring through Jurassic park.

This afternoon, I had the audacity to pop three dvds in our player and watch the whole afternoon as if I didn't have any report tomorrow that I should be preparing myself with. I watched marathon -ish the three Jurassic Park (I, II, and III) and still find it so fun to watch (I still think that the T-rex is cute, but not the greatest predator on earth, think about Megalodon, first encountered in the novel Meg by I-forgot-the-name-of-the-author). I can't wait to see the upcoming Jurassic Park 4 (my sis told me Keira knightley stars in this).

III. Going back to the Wardrobe...

My cousin confessed he hadn't yet watched The Chronicles of Narnia (although it became his book report in Ateneo) and was so interested in watching it, and of all cousins he thinks of dragging with him to watch it, he chose me. I'm more than willing to watch the movie again, so I accepted his offer and went to the cinemas with him (by that time, it was the fight between Pacqiao and Morales). Again...long live Narnia.

And since I watched it alloveragain I remember I wanted the soundtrack so i began thinking about it until now. I searched in the net for the list of the soundtrack and found this. I especially liked Alanis' song. You know, just hearing it makes me tap my feet and piques my imagination. It is the perfect song to psyche me up.

IV. Hooked with Robert Landon

And finally! finally! The DaVinci Code is here. I don't need to elaborate on this, do I? makes me giddy. I hope they were faithful on the book, you know, they did the movie according to the Book and not by some screenplay writer's, producer's, or director's idea...

Toothache

2006-01-20T03:19:00.000-08:00

I accompanied my mom albeit with a heavy heart to watch "Don't Give Up On Us" right after regular classes. I mean, just typing the title here makes my stomach turn. I don't hate filipino movies, I'm just picky with them..But honestly, i wouldn't be caught dead watching mushy romance movies where actors like Judy Ann Santos and Piolo Pascual stars (what? you? you again??? how many love lives you have???). For the sake of the Big Mac treat (Yes, Big Mac. I haven't had one for like...ages.) I walked towards the dreaded cinema with turret-like eyes, swiftly scanning the group of people hovering about the cinemas, carefully sifting through to see if there are any college or high school students nearby, especially old acquaintances who might recognize me (oh horrors!) and wonder what I am doing with a movie Don't Give Up On Us. I shuffled through the cinema, tried to hide behind my mother and prayed the cinema was dim enough to conceal my appearance. For the first time in our entire movie-watching together, my mom didn't have to drag me, bribe me, or blackmail me just to get me to watch the movies with her (God, like that movie "Milan" I can't believe I watched that). I just walked behind her with that succumbing air. I could almost imagine myself waving a white flag in my hand, walking through the entrance: Okay I give up, let's watch this movie and be done with it.

Don't get me started with the movie, I didn't come here to type how saccharine sweet the movie is or how Judy Ann and Piolo threw their witty lines/cliches with a glazed, dreamy, teary look in their eyes. the only noteworthy thing to note here are the scenic views of Baguio, Banaue rice Terraces, and Sagada.

By the end of the movie I felt my jaws ache. Ache from trying to restrain myself from cracking a laugh or two whenever the two lovebirds get overly dramatic with each other (my mother was glaring at me) or whenever the group of lovesick girls sitting behind us give out a wistful sigh ("Aaaaawww!!!") or giggle to death with undiluted joy [of seeing Piolo-the-gay kiss Judy ann).

During the movie, I kept on shifting in my seat: "I can't believe I'm sitting through this movie..with phony actors who happen to possess terrific acting skills and guts..."

Oh well, I was doing it all for my mother--who wanted to see the movie because someone told her it was good...no, not good--beautiful. pfft...

1000 places to see before you die - hmm...appropriate eh?

2006-01-19T01:54:00.000-08:00

My aunt greeted me with the news that she already has the book she was craving for: 1000 Places to See Before You Die by Patricia Schultz.

The book features a thick list and brief descriptions (in addition with contacts) of fantastic places, locations, and spots (they are all the same, what's the diff between these terms???). Of course, I looked immediately for Philippines. What has Philippine got to boast of? Well, here they are.

Banaue Rice Terraces: Banaue, Luzon, Philippines.

"Earth Art, Millenia Old"

Ah, the famous rice terraces that I always hear but had never seen. Here is what Miss Schultz has to say about our terraces:

"Access is difficult since, the roads are roughly paved, but the effort rewards you with gorgeous views of one of the lesser-known wonders of the ancient world, covering more than 4,000 square miles. Bring a sweater, plenty of film, and good hiking boots, as Banaue is the perfect base from which to visit the villages of the Ifugao, the region's tribal people. the quality of light, the mountain air, and the drama of the ancient earthworks may make you leave your heart in the highlands." (Schultz, 2003, pp. 492-493)

So, the description "lesser-known wonders of the ancient world" was more than compensated by "may make you leave your heart in the highlands..."

Taal Volcano: tagaytay, Luzon, Philippines.

"A Lake within a Volcano Within a Lake Within an Island."

Been there, seen it. Good.

"...one of Asia's most beautiful panoramas. Among the world's lowest and smallest volcanoes, Taal is filled with water, creating a lake, yet the volcano itself is located within a larger lake (as the tour guides are wont to chant, "A lake within a volcano, within a lake, within the island of Luzon.")The blues and greens of the vista from forested Tagaytay Ridge have for generations made this a favorite getaway from the heat and chaos of downtown Manila." (Schultz, 2003, p. 493)

I think I've been in the hotel that the writer in the book mentions. The hotel has this sorta vast "backyard" where you can see the whole, clear (on clear days), and unobstructed view of the Taal lake.

Amanpulo: Pamalican island, Philippines.

"Garboesque Isolation on a Private Isle."

I've been in palawan, but we stayed at the top portion (Coron), here, Amanpulo is located at the bottom area of palawan, I think. maybe I should have boarded the ship all the way down...

"Of the Philippines' 7000-odd islands, Pamalican is a very special getaway, a miniscule speck in the Sula Sea on which has been created a sibling of the Aman Resort, the archetypal luxury Asian getaway."

"Roll out of your immense bed, pad across your enormous private casita, and awaken with the day on the Amanpulo's footprint-free talcum-powder beach, surely the most dazzling in the Philippines. Leaving your airy home will be the day's biggest challenge; the forty exquisite casitas are modeled after traditional bahay kubo houses, built of local materials, and decorated with gallery-quality crafts. if you do makje it outside, you can engage in ahost of enticing water activities including windsurfing, sailing, fishing and most especially scuba-diving--a coral reef encircles the 220-acre island only about 1000 feet fromk shore, in some of the purest water you'll ever see."

"...it commands spectacular views of teh surrounding islands, all framed by thge muiltiple aquamarine, peacock, and turquoise blues of the sea." (Schultz, 2003, pp. 493-494)

Sounds and looks breath-taking. Makes me pine for white sand beaches, clear blue skies, and even bluer and clearer seas. In short, a Virgin island. But let me tell you, a night in this "heaven-on-earth" will cost you about an-eye-popping 575 dollars. (That's got to be...29,900 pesos a night basing on the current value of dollars)Oh well, I thought you wanted to experience "unpopulated heaven".

Zounds. click these thumbnail pics.

check the gallery here:Amanpulo Resort

Well, gotta go. American idol is showing. It's been nice touring with you. Till we meet again.

Ye got balls!

2006-01-17T21:27:00.000-08:00

When I was about to log in in blogger, my internet load ran out (so you now know that I connect via dial-up, not broadband). Sonova--

So I had to run out of the house and outside, under the unmerciful sun, and along a public school (Don't you psssst me or I'll swear to the powerful being above I'll knock your two front teeth) to the nearest store just to purchase a bloody internet load.

So here I am. Three minutes tops.

Monday: I had the guts (I would have said "balls") to watch the Corpse Bride dvd K-ann lent me all for the sake of hearing Mister Johnny Depp talk. I was munching KitKat and Butterfinger bars* throughout the opening credits of the movie, waiting for Jonny Depp to speak out. At last, when he finally uttered a line, I almost collapsed with joy.

The movie was so-so. But still its Johnny depp what I am all about. However, it is my desire to express my sympathy towards the "Corpse Bride Emily", she never really got her happy ending (although, Tim Burton tried to make her look contented in the end)and she remained the loser.

Johnny depp's dubbing of Victor was not that impressive, it was a wee bit disappointing (according to my standards, I guess) I never really liked the "Victor" character, anyway.

***

I studied hard in History and PGC. I nearly bled my brain to death. Turns out that PGC was easy and History was hard. If ever i'm going to admit this, I'm sure people will kill me for being somewhat an oddball: I like History, although it really took me pains in trying to read a whole portion of the book for the exam, it still turned out unsuccessful. i wasn't able to aswer correctly the two-points Modified True or False and the mentally grueling Matching Type.

Sad life, isn't it?

* there's a story behind these [my] well-earned chocolate. I'll post the story here sometime.

Ennui eating away

2006-01-11T00:57:00.000-08:00

I'm rather having a boring life. Actually it's a hectic-yet-boring life, I don't know how that came to be or if it's even possible but...

there came a time when I wish I would stumble upon a wardrobe and find myself delightfully transported to an entirely different world, or that I wish there was this magical world that secretly exists and is in desperate need of my help. You could also start imagining yourself recieving a highly dangerous ring, or better yet find out that a powerful wizard is tailing you and when he did catches your attention, he would break the wonderful news that congratulations! you are qualified to study in their academy for sorcery and stuff. Also, you could always flatter yourself by imagining that you were Aragorn and you are actually the long lost heir of a certain kingdom. You could also try creating (or buying) a bow and quiver of arrows for yourself and start acting like Legolas inside your campus, like maybe, surprise people you particularly hate at the lover's lane and give them that suspicious look while prodding your ready arrowhead on their schnozzles, or you could always resort to that foul game of calling names like "Hey, you, orc!" or "You look like an Uruk-hai...no joking." or "Because I hate you and I want you out my sight, maybe I'll just blast you to smithereens with a spell...don't you think so?" or tell your friend that "Aslan is here! Jaedis is soooo dead meat..."

Well, don't you just dream away this things you wish you could actually do? It may sound silly, but once in a while I find that imagining crazy things is fun to do, especially when you substitute your life in great stories (turned movies), you know what I'm talking about...

New Year - my chance for a Change.

2006-01-01T05:36:00.000-08:00

Happy, Happy New Year! This year I prepared a list of things that needed revision, ressurection, reincarnation, recycling, and renovation. I am determined to change alot of things in me and fulfill others. I'm dead serious (haha!)

Anyway, I wanna say sorry to the people who I did not get the chance to greet on Christmas Eve and New years, I'm truly sorry! It's not that I don't wanna greet you or anything, I just don't have any load and I'm pretty poor and broke to buy me one. I prioritized my friend's gifts so I do not have any cheese left, unfortunately. I'm really sorry.

Oh but I greet all of the human livings breathing in this terrestrial sphere a Happy new year! albeit it's late...

A brief sojourn to Bicol...

2006-01-01T05:04:00.000-08:00

December 28: I left to go home to my "half" province (Pangasinan is another) to attend my cousin's wedding. It's a bit hurried because we do not intend to spend New Years in Bicol. After a gruelling 8-11 hours of travel, we managed to return to good ol' Quezon City with sore butts to boot and with some of my low resolution pics I managed to steal from mom's digicam.

It's me and my cousin in a fastfood restaurant, on our way to Bicol. We look happy and fresh then, when our behinds were not yet getting pressure sores.

the view from our cousin's resthouse. It's actually breathtaking than this sordid pic I however managed to shot through the window pane. (the terrace was wet and I had no shoes on)

another view from the bedroom to the right. the beauty of this sea(shore) was unfortunately caught ugly in my cam.

and lastly, a beautiful stained glass window at the rear of the church (cathedral) almost at the outskirts of Naga city. I forgot the name of the church but all I can remember are the stained glass windows that are noteworthy to gaze up to.

I'll be returning to Cam Sur soon enough, but next time I promise I'll bring my sister's Pentax camera which is genuinely the one meant for photography--professional photography, I'm still harnessing it to perfection.

Philippines in National Geographic.

2005-12-26T21:38:00.000-08:00

Nat'l Geographic channel featured two of philippines' famous events in their show Amazing Moments placed as firsts. Mt. Pinatubo's eruption garnered a first place in the most amazing natural disasters, showing a video of our native people and the famous long-been-dormant volcano Pinatubo. Made me laugh how the english narrator mentioned the Pee-ne-tew-bo.
Second was the famous self-flagellation of our kababayans and the self-crucifixion, also first placer in another category. Filipinos has amazing pain endurance and courage to do that

Watching what our kababayan did to themselves (and will do) makes my knee melt.